My daughter is a troubled teen. I have done a pretty good job containing her until recently because she turned 18. She told me my rules were stupid and that she did not have to follow them now that she is 18. I told her she had to live by my rules. So she left.
So of course she told everyone I kicked her out...NOT true. However she has always lied. I am divorced. I have probably enabled her and we have had to move several times in 18years when I had to take better jobs or due to the divorce or lack of child support.
My family knows very little on what is going on until she ran off. Of course they are very startled because they are unaware of her past. So now instead of contacting me they are forming their own opinions. Telling me "we need break" or "she is being a typical teen"
This could not e further from the truth. She has pushed me down. Threatned me. Her younger brother and sister are scared of her. She cusses and refuses to do anything. She has snuck boys into the house and also snuck out. She has yelled at me infront of guests and lied to get her dad in troule with CPS just beause she was mad on a discipline issue. She has been suspended from school.She had skipped classes. I sent her to a camp a few years back and she had sex with a perfect stranger that gave her a fake number and name. I have had to take her every year to get tested for STD. She has shoved me down now that she is bigger than me. Everything and anything I ask her to do turns into a war. She scares me....I hate being scared of my own daughter.
I also hate that my family wants to assume when they no little of her past. As of now I really am not communicating with my family. You would think in a time like this they would be more supportive. Does anyone out there gone through something like this where they are scared of their child? How do I protect my younger kids?
This is only a small sample of things she has done. She was diagosed woth severe ADD but will not take her medication.
Asked by Anonymous at 8:58 PM on Mar. 22, 2011 in Adult Children (18+)
Answer by feralkitten at 9:03 PM on Mar. 22, 2011
Answer by Anonymous at 9:05 PM on Mar. 22, 2011
Answer by Renee3K at 9:07 PM on Mar. 22, 2011
I agree with Renee3K. I've worked with at-risk children for many years, and there's usually a history of issues within the family. Not saying that you're a bad mom, but as you stated, you may have enabled her as a child to act the way she is acting now that she's a young person. Unfortunately, 18 is too late for an intervention if there are no dependent children or illegal behaviors. All you can do at this point is NOT enable her to continue her actions in your home. Create a plan and share it openly with her. Have a conversation with her and communicate adult-to-adult that her actions are risky and express how it hurts you to see her hurting herself. Tell her that you love her, and will always love her, but that she has to take responsibility for the consequences that will result from the choices she's making. (cont)
Answer by kenzie07 at 9:23 PM on Mar. 22, 2011
Answer by kenzie07 at 9:30 PM on Mar. 22, 2011
Answer by kenzie07 at 9:34 PM on Mar. 22, 2011
Answer by tyfry7496 at 9:55 PM on Mar. 22, 2011
Answer by Anonymous at 9:32 AM on Mar. 23, 2011
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