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10 Bumps

Help/ Very Good Story...PLS HELP!!!! adult content

Hubby and I have been married for 12years now . have had our ups and downs. We just went through an affair. We cme past it all and tried to start over. About a month and a half ago I went through his phone and sent a text using a number in the "recent history", because he deleted all his messeges. Even all from me that day...it seemed strange to me. Anyway I sent a messsage saying "what r u up 2"...The reply was "sitting here in the bed thinking of you" AW SHIT was my very thought! So after a few more text acting like him, I woke his ass up the hard way with hot water to the face. He woke up in a daze like WTF so I told him. He denided it, so I read the text back to him, then told her it was me the whole time. She waited a long time to reply, then it was hey you long time no hear...WTF!!! I called her, he said they had only talked for a couple of weeks, it took her a long, long time to tell me how long! A LIE!!! So the next day he get his moms phone and uses it, I found it in his pocket. lol...he then to me they had been talking for over a year again! OH helll no!! I called her and said " you care nothing for our family and he will do the same to you, im his wife so what do u expect! then hung up." I went to his moms and gave her her phone and told her, she was mad, so called but ,I already know.! Since then he has been so angry almost hating me, well I feel he does hate me! He always tells me all bad things and never anything good. Its a shame I hear better things from men off the street! IDK what to do...I ended it but the love is there still, hes never going to change, I know I can find better,...What would you do?

 
MIXED

Asked by MIXED at 9:03 AM on Mar. 23, 2011 in Relationships

Level 5 (89 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (15)
  • Writing is on the wall, he is showing you over and over again that he is not worthy - if you stay then you get what you have allowed. Despite what we think we can NEVER change someone else - a cheater is a cheater for life usually. YOU deserve so much better - find a man who will love you and appreciate everything you are and lifts you up - not this loser who drags you down. In my prior relationships I did the back and forth because I still "loved" them no matter how bad they were for me. Late night calls, professions of love and how they had changed - but it was always the same drill. I'd go back and things went right back to the way they were. Oh how many years I wasted on those harmful games. BE STRONG and move on.
    8Tinkerboo8

    Answer by 8Tinkerboo8 at 9:59 AM on Mar. 23, 2011

  • As hard as it is stick by your decsion to end it. He doesn't want to be a woman man and that is what you want. I don't know you but I am a firm believer that everyone has a perfect match out there somewhere. Sometimes you have to go thru a lot of bad matches to find him. But you will. just focus on your self for a little while. You will need to heal and mend the wounds he inflicted before you can be in a healthy relationship. Good Luck.
    Liamsmom09

    Answer by Liamsmom09 at 9:08 AM on Mar. 23, 2011

  • If it were me, I would be done with the relationship and that's it. A man can only do to a woman what she lets him.
    virgo550

    Answer by virgo550 at 9:47 AM on Mar. 23, 2011

  • I am sure you have the love but obviously he does not. End it now and move on with your life.
    Belinda7560

    Answer by Belinda7560 at 9:14 AM on Mar. 23, 2011

  • agree with liam..you should be totally done with him..so what he's mad oh well he will get over it..now he got just what he wanted but i bet for him its no fun now..u continue 2 take care of your kids and get your happy back..its a thin line between love n hate..

    cammay

    Answer by cammay at 9:19 AM on Mar. 23, 2011

  • I was there. I was with my ex husband for 6 years. I knew he was screwing around but I kept thinking I can change him, he always promised to stop, he was sorry, it never happened. The final straw was when I went into labor 3 1/2 weeks early, I searched every bar within a 40 mile radius, I called every woman I knew about and I could not find him. I found his friends and told them to tell him and no one could find him. So you get the picture, I went into labor water breaking on Thursday early afternoon, I was so stressed from not being able to find him, I did not dilate completely (only to 7). He showed up at 2:25 AM Saturday morning, smelling like another woman. His family was there, my family was there and the Doctor knocked him out with one great punch. I had my son with my fathers coaching at 2:30 am (go figure bar closing in WI). Our son weighed 8lbs 8oz. that was the most liberating day of my life. I got divorced 2 months
    Leeli12410

    Answer by Leeli12410 at 9:19 AM on Mar. 23, 2011

  • See, I like you! Straight up confronted the situation like a BEAST! OMG! I was tripping off the hot water to the face...you are the real deal. If you feel things are ended and you are confident in that decision, do what is best for you and yours. It's sad that you all have been together for so long for all this to happen. Hope things get better for you soon.
    MrsJStearns

    Answer by MrsJStearns at 10:06 AM on Mar. 23, 2011

  • I am so sorry that your husband did this to you and your family,,, I think if you stick by your choice, it will be better in the long run,,I am proud of you! I would have loved to see the look on his face after the water!!!!!! Don't beat your self up,, but get a really good lawyer, and be sure to get AS MUCH child support and spousal support as possible, let her support his stupid butt! Huggles to you!
    kimigogo

    Answer by kimigogo at 9:35 AM on Mar. 23, 2011

  • First off, I laughed so hard when I read that you threw water in his face when he was sleeping! Priceless! Secondly, I say it's time to end the relationship for good. You have already been through the hell and he's not being respectful of your feelings or of your marriage. Men get so mad when they get caught and they act like the victims, pointing out their woman's flaws because they are trying to get the attention away from what they did, to see if they can get you to want their attention and approval...well hun, I believe that you are better than that! You don't need his approval, you need to get rid of him. The best revenge a wife can have? Letting the mistress keep him, chances are things won't work out for them either and they both get theirs in the end. ;) Good luck to you! I wish you all the best in being strong and respecting yourself more than he does!
    AWomansMind

    Answer by AWomansMind at 10:10 AM on Mar. 23, 2011

  • LEAVE HIM!! You do not deserve that crap! No one does!
    eluc

    Answer by eluc at 10:45 AM on Mar. 23, 2011

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