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what happens now?

i just found out that im pregnant.my heart is breaking because i really,really cant afford it right now.i have 2 planned kids,one of them a baby still,and although me and my husband are doing well,it took us a while to get here and another baby will take us back to our struggling days,yes,yes,i was on the pill,no,he doesnt know yet.what am i going to do?what now?i am so scared right now.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:02 AM on Nov. 26, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • Firstly *hugs*. Secondly, I know it's hard but the only way you're going to be able to work this out is if you talk to your husband. Tell him, he'll understand, as you were on the pill. But before you talk to him work out what you're going to say, write a list down, don't just mumble. And remember it all depends on what you want to do. Consider everything, work out where you stand before informing your husband. Good Luck honey.
    haleykarson

    Answer by haleykarson at 8:07 AM on Nov. 26, 2008

  • Before you freak out....talk to him.
    sbastille

    Answer by sbastille at 8:07 AM on Nov. 26, 2008

  • First, tell him. You need his support now more than ever. And you can do this. There are lots of options for assistance, lots of options for working from home and more ways than most people can think of to save money. And remember, in the beginning, they don't need much, a few sleepers, a couple of receiving blankets, diapers and possibly formula. There are millions of people all over the world that have kids they can't afford and they make it somehow. You can too. Good luck to you.
    chillemi78

    Answer by chillemi78 at 8:10 AM on Nov. 26, 2008

  • Ditto to the other ladies. First thing is telling him. He loves you. He'll support you and I'm sure you'll be able to make the right decision together!
    sophiafarris

    Answer by sophiafarris at 8:48 AM on Nov. 26, 2008

  • I agree with everyone. Even if it is tomorrow or tonight think it all over first and know there are options. I know it is never easy. You just need to trust he loves you and will work this out with you. I have 5 kids and my oldest will be 7 in 2 months. We struggle and it can be hard time to time. Thankfully we have been doing great lately. I do know how you wonder where you are going to get money for food or pay a bill. It put a strain on a but we got through it. Good Luck!!!
    momofangels5

    Answer by momofangels5 at 8:56 AM on Nov. 26, 2008

  • Its going to be fine. You will work it out and get by. Just let him know so that you can figure it out together.
    momofsaee

    Answer by momofsaee at 9:27 AM on Nov. 26, 2008

  • First of all ,talk to him...Maybe u can work things out. If u both decide u cant afford another baby at this time,maybe u look in to adoptions.I know it would be so hard. I am a single mom raising 4 kids alone with no child supports at all. I never had their fathers support except for my two boys father but he passed on so Im alone in raising them. Its very difficult especially with them going thru their teen years and thats when they need male role models in their lifes. So think about what is best for ur baby..But please do not even think of the A word......
    deafrose

    Answer by deafrose at 9:33 AM on Nov. 26, 2008

  • I know this is scary. I went through this exact same thing back in July. My youngest was moving from a private preschool into public school and we were finally finding ourselves getting comfortable with where we were financially. We were looking forward to having a little money leftover at the end of each month. Then, much to our surprise we found out we were pregnant. We were both very shocked and very scared at first. Neither of us could fathom the idea of going back to being financially strapped month after month. It took a couple of weeks and a lot of talking but we realized, just as you will, that we are never given things in life that we can't handle. We're still unsure of how everything will work out financially but we've made it to a point where we are happy about this new baby. Things may be tight but you can do it. There are many things to consider here. If you want to talk, please send me a message.
    sillyt

    Answer by sillyt at 9:54 AM on Nov. 26, 2008

  • if you breast feed babies aren't that expensive right away... you have some time to figure it out.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:11 AM on Nov. 26, 2008

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