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How do I solve my easy frustration with my baby?

My son was a such a hungry baby before solids (which I started him early at 3 months!) so sleep was a joke! I suffered without my sleep but did it all for him and it wasn't long atfer he was 3 months he started to sleep a lot better so I got some rest. It has always happened and always at night time and only when he gets really upset about something and crys and crys that I get really frustrated and I'm very rough with him. I'm ashamed to admit it and I hate it when I do it and feel like bad mum. This is starting to happen again and now his 5 and a half months old and I don't understand why. I get plenty of sleep so I think I might be getting too much! My partner hardly helps out with him and his at work all the time so I think it's just as I have him constantly and never have a break that this happens? What do you guys think? Do I need to see my doctor about it? Is there something wrong with me lol? I'm quite a happy person normally but things arn't that good with the partner at the moment and havn't been for a while I think it may be related to that again. Al your advice would be great and help me out heaps. Thanks in advance!

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Asked by eMMz48 at 9:27 PM on Mar. 23, 2011 in Babies (0-12 months)

Level 1 (2 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • I'm glad you can admit that you get rough with him, but this is a problem and you need to find some kind of release from stress before you take it out on your son!! Ask your partner for more help. Sometimes men really are clueless and things need to be spelled out from him. Have him watch the baby while you go for a run, or go have a cup of coffee, or whatever it is that can relieve some of your stress. But please please please do not take it out on your innocent baby. There is NO excuse for that.

    Answer by cdecker83 at 9:38 PM on Mar. 23, 2011

  • I admit I was the same way wiyh my first. It was all the little things added up: taking the lion's share of household and parenting duties, loss of my sense of self outside of being Mommy, jealousy that my SO's life pretty much stayed the same, lack of sleep... A crying baby seemed like the strw that broke the camel's back: not the most frustrating thing, but enough to make it all topple.
    All I can say is that it gets better with time. Try to get out with or without the baby. Sometims a little bit of fresh air, or even just a change in scenery goes a long way. Hang in there Momma and PM me if you need to vent.
    And don't feel ashamed!

    Answer by Nicoles2LilRams at 9:40 PM on Mar. 23, 2011

  • I completely understand your frustration, I too am a stay at home mom and get little to no breaks from my little one. I would talk to your Dr or find a counselor especially if you are getting rough with the little one.    Get help before it really becomes a problem, it sound to me like depression.   Things are not going to get better on there own you need to be proactive


    Answer by Graciesmom528 at 9:45 PM on Mar. 23, 2011

  • I do think you should talk to your doctor. If you have some post pardom depression then you should treat it and it might make life a lot better all around. Also, if you start losing your cool put your son down and walk away for a minute, take a few deep breaths and pull yourself together and go back to try again. If he's crying and nothing works while you're holding him it's not going to hurt him to cry for a couple of minutes in his crib. And remind yourself that this will not last forever. He's probably hit a growth spurt or started getting a tooth and will hopefully go back to sleeping better after a week or two. If you really feel yourself losing it then wake your husband, or let him know you're going out for an hour or two when he gets home- it's his baby as much as yours and he needs to help you out. Don't be ashamed, but if you know there is a problem you have to do something to fix it. Good luck.

    Answer by MaryMW at 9:46 PM on Mar. 23, 2011

  • Yes, PLEASE talk to your doctor.

    Answer by gdiamante at 10:38 PM on Mar. 23, 2011

  • Thank you everyone, I think I will see my doctor just to make sure there is nothing wrong but I do think it'sa build up of events and I know I should not take it out on my son and I don't mean to at all. The times I do this is when I know there is nothing wrong with him and his crying just for the sake of it lol and its only ever at night time. I don't think it's depression as I'm so happy most the time and I'm fine with him all day even when he has his little cry's for no reason so why does it only happen late at night? Probably as it's my tiredest point of the day and don't have much patience as I just need to relax? I don't think its a major problem just too much on my plate and makes me feel a lot better that some of you have gone through the same so I don't feel as bad.

    Comment by eMMz48 (original poster) at 6:56 AM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • Also keep in mind that your little one could just need a to have a little fussy time to tire himself out, my son had a fussy time when he had extra energ to burn. i thought i was going crazy every day when he would cry about the same time but when i asked the doc he told me that is how some babies deal with getting rid of their extra energy. Also remembver crying is their only way of communicating with us ;) so it's not his fault he can tell you what he wants.. don't ever feel alone there are many moms like you and i myself who get fustrated just step back and as many said take a deep breath and make sure to talk to a doctor to make sure that you don't have anything else that could be triggering anger ;)

    Answer by BobbieJo286 at 6:27 PM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • Thank you so much for all your adivce :) It's great to know I'm not the only one

    Comment by eMMz48 (original poster) at 6:02 AM on Mar. 25, 2011

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