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6 Bumps

All he does is work and sleep

So, my hubby works like 70 hours a week so I know when he is home he needs extra sleep. He got off of work yesterday at 11:30pm, but decided not to go to bed until 4:30am and then slept until 2:30pm. Got up (around my DD's nap time) and ate cereal, then fell back asleep until 5:30pm. NOW it's 1opm and he fell asleep again. It's starting to piss me off that even on his days off it seems like he doesn't want to spend time with us! Like, he should have went to bed last night at a reasonable hour .... AHHHH he's snoring and pissing me off! Do I have a right to be aggravated? I mean reallllly?


Asked by Anonymous at 10:01 PM on Mar. 23, 2011 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (22)
  • I have a tough time with something kind of like this.

    My dad works 70 hours a week, comes home and works his ass off at home, too. He is a great provider, but also spends a lot of time doing stuff at home and spending time with his family.

    S/O on the other hand, works 50 hours a week (to my 45), comes home and does NOTHING. I clean, cook, handle the kids, etc. on my own. While I am greatful that he spends time with us, I get just a pissed that he doesn't help out around the house, and complains about having to get up at 10 on his days off.

    I think you have every right to be irritated, but you're going about it the wrong way by coming on here and complaining about it. You should talk to him and tell him how mad it makes you. Encourage him to go to bed early and spend more time with you. Try to make it positive (which is hard, I know!).
    Good luck!

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:26 PM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • I would say no not really, he's doing the best he can on such a hectic schedule I'd tell him how you feel but not expect any sudden changes because that might make him feel underappreciated and make him irritable right back, try a gentle approach like loving on him, maybe giving him a foot or back rub and begin by telling him you are grateful for the sacrifices he makes with his extensive occupational commute but that you'd also love it if he'd make more of an effort to sync up his schedule to maximize family time :)

    Answer by LovableFox at 10:15 PM on Mar. 23, 2011

  • I do understand your aggravation, and we went through a very similar situation when our boys were young. My husband worked outrageous hours, and I basically felt like a single mom. It may take him some time to wind down after working, and I'm sure he's exhausted....unfortunately, you are also ready for some adult interaction, and attention. I don't know what the solution is, other than, eventually my husband no longer had to work those hours, and wasn't so exhausted.

    He also felt like he was missing out on his boys childhood, and time with his well as time to do anything he enjoyed. He either was working, sleeping or doing chores, no party for him either.

    Good Luck Honey, hopefully it will get better and you'll get more time together, in the meantime, as hard as it is, be thankful he has a good job........hugs.

    Answer by ohwrite at 10:06 PM on Mar. 23, 2011

  • OMG! I just wrote almost the same story in the SAHM group! AAAAHhhh! Same here!

    Answer by Mom564 at 10:03 PM on Mar. 23, 2011

  • Here's an idea. You can do one of two things. Either stop bitching and be glad that your husband is a good provider or get a job so he doesn't have to work so many hours and then come home to a nagging wife.


    Answer by Anonymous at 10:05 PM on Mar. 23, 2011

  • Cut the guy a break! If he works that much, let the guy sleep!

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:07 PM on Mar. 23, 2011

  • Who the hell said she was nagging. He's sleeping and she's bitchn' to you. How's that work for me. My husband works a regular 40 hour week and does the same damn thing! And I guess we sit at home and eat bon bons all day so were ready to party when they come home.

    Answer by Mom564 at 10:10 PM on Mar. 23, 2011

  • BTW I am very very grateful he works two jobs and crazy hours to support us and I show him we appreciate him as well.

    Answer by NewMayMommy_25 at 10:10 PM on Mar. 23, 2011

  • Maybe you should appreciate the fact that he's busting his tail to support you so you can stay home instead of griping about how he works 70 hours a week and sleeps.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:13 PM on Mar. 23, 2011

  • I work a ton of hours myself and my hubby is the one who gets neglected and honestly, he doesn't complain when I sleep because he knows. I need it. reality is.. yes, he could have gone to bed at a "reasonable" hour if his body allowed him to.. but with that type of schedule he probably wasn't able or ready to.. I know that's why I am awake right now instead of sleeping with hubby.. I am on nights for work so, going to bed early will mean grouchy me tomorrow.. it's hard, I know but it is what's needed.

    Answer by Camilletnt at 2:12 AM on Mar. 24, 2011