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5 Bumps

Ok this is a little embarrassing but I really need help!! adult content

I am only 24 yrs old but I hardly have any sex drive. I don't even think about it or want it. My man has been really understanding about this and I love him for it. We have done as long as 4 months without doing it. I want to know if I'm the only one out there like this lol. I mean I think my guys attractive but idk I just can't get into the mood.... any advice on how?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:34 AM on Mar. 24, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (16)
  • are you having an orgasim each time? that's probably why you don't want to. the only way i can have one is if i use a vibrater too. it made me a little bit more willing. i never wanted to before because i never enjoyed it all that much to begin with. i know what to expect and it's not that great.
    TiffanieK

    Answer by TiffanieK at 12:37 AM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • well, I don't think it's abnormal... so, there is that! Maybe you have a lot of stress going on in your life which makes it difficult to feel sexy, etc. I would try to take a relaxing break, maybe listen to some music and a bath or a glass of wine and a good book, give yourself a break then start thinking about having sex and what you like about it and then.. act on it. We have droughts too but mainly they are based on stress, kids and work.
    Camilletnt

    Answer by Camilletnt at 12:39 AM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • One night I was really bored and started going through Instant Queue on Netflix. I came across this show called Sexual Healing. It really opened my eyes on some issues. There was one couple dealing with a similar issue. The sex therapist was doing the interviews and giving them some advice. I know that one thing that she had this specific lady do was to go to her OBGYN and explain to her doctor about this very specific issue. I certainly would have never thought to talk to my doctor about an extremely private issue like this.
    dustbunny

    Answer by dustbunny at 12:43 AM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • I think that it is unusual. Whether it's abnormal? I don't know. Have you discussed this with your gynecologist? You may have a low testosterone level that affects your libido. Or are you on medications that have known side-effects including decreased libido?

    Are you happy with this situation? If so, and your husband doesnt' mind it, then you're probably ok. However, if you're not, then definitely talk with your doctor.


    Busimommi

    Answer by Busimommi at 12:45 AM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • I do have orgasms when we have sex but thats when I actually want it. I actually went to a doctor and talked about it but it didn't get anywhere...I know this may sound ignorant but is there a difference between your doctor and an gyn? I mean my doctor does my the pap.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:53 AM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • Sex is all mental. You decide whether or not your going to have sex before it even comes up. You can get yourself in the mood by thinking of things that will arouse you or even pleasuring yourself first. If you aren't in that state of mind, then your partner won't be able to turn you on and if he does it's very hard. Men are visual stimulators...women are emotional. So think about sex and if you even plan it liek that morning or something it'll work your mind up for really wanting it later.

    Hope this helps! GL.

    p.s. your Gyn may be able to help...but really a counselor would probably be better.
    Keeely07

    Answer by Keeely07 at 1:05 AM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • Do you masturbate? If not start, once your body get's used to orgasms you might start to want sex.
    jonellg

    Answer by jonellg at 1:05 AM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • It could be a problem with your hormones, once they get wigged out...your sexual desire can change, since I'm dealing with pretty much the same thing and I know it is hormones. It wouldn't hurt for your Dr to do some blood work to find out. Its a problem that is easy to resolve if it is hormonal . GL
    justalady774

    Answer by justalady774 at 1:27 AM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • im 25 and have been with my partner for over a year, and we have a 3 month old. to say the least, during the pregnancy i didnt want sex, but we still were intimate sexual, just no penetration. i tore giving birth, and i have scar tissue that makes me scared to have sex, but we did after our son was two months, we havent had it since. of course, my circumstance is a lil different. we are currently working on our house, so we have stayed at my moms and now we are at my dads. there was a lil more privacy at moms. none at dads really. stress, pp, and past intimacy issues are factors in my disinterest. its ok to not want to have sex, but make sure you guys are still intimate and enjoying each other, cuddling, massages, shower together, make it fun. give yourself time, but dont be hard on yourself, it wont come if you push it :) GL
    Arretsmomma5

    Answer by Arretsmomma5 at 1:34 AM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • Are you on birth control? If so the hormones could be messing with your libido.
    merandaobrien

    Answer by merandaobrien at 1:58 AM on Mar. 24, 2011

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