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2 Bumps

How can I help my 3 year old son work through his attachment with me?

My 3 year old son is so attached to me that he won't let his father anywhere near me. When we even holds hands or sit next to each other on the couch he flips out and starts getting mad and throwing things. His father and I don't live together right now but we are still a couple.  So he isn't there very often.  Mostly it is just me, my 3 year old son and 9 year old daughter.


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Asked by dpriser at 11:24 AM on Mar. 24, 2011 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Level 4 (41 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • My sons like this to a certain extend but not with me and his father, he just doesn't want his father doing anything for him because he wants me to do it. I wish I had answers but i'll give ya a bump.

    Answer by mlmsm928 at 11:28 AM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • I would try getting a sitter and getting away from him at times, and mybe pushing your hubby and your son together even if he throws a tantrum and you leave for a few hours.

    Answer by fun3oo at 11:32 AM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • I'm in the same situation with dd. She won't let me cuddle with dh and its mostly when she gets cranky and tired she will follow me around or want me to hold her when I'm busy doing laundry or cleaning.

    Answer by sweetpea1217 at 11:33 AM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • I would try going out and buying him something that you each can have a part of, me and my son use those rubber bracelets that the kids wear, i tell him they are just for me and him and i give him one of mine and he gives me one of his and this way we are always together. /he is 5 and only uses it if he has nightmares now, or if he is going away to see my mom or something. But it worked great before. Explain to him, big guys have to be away from mom sometimes and your "special" item will keep you guys close, in a big secret kinda way. May work, maybe can't hurt! Good luck.

    Answer by JenzAmomOf2 at 11:34 AM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • It's almost cute he's protective of his momma, but then again I'm not the one dealing with it. I like JenzAmomof2s response, maybe give that a try?

    Answer by yesmaam at 11:46 AM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • My firstborn went through that . .. she used to try and pry our hands apart. It was funny . . . . but it passed. Mt second never did that. I think he sees he and his sister as a unit and my husband and I as a unit. It helps when other kids are around. Is this the oldest?

    Answer by ImaginationMama at 11:48 AM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • THis is my youngest. He dad and I don't live together right now but are still together and so it is mostly just me, my 3 year old son and 9 year old daughter.

    Comment by dpriser (original poster) at 12:06 PM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • I notice that my 3 year old gets angry with her dad if I'm trying to get a little space and he helps. For example, I'll be miserable in bed with a back ache (pregnant) and she wants lay near me but can't do so without kicking me, moving too much, or digging her knees into my back or belly. If I ask her to let me lay by myself for a while and daddy tries to help me move her away, she gets very mad at him even if I'm the one wanting her to move. So it may not be that he just doesn't want his dad near you, but that he's mad at you making space from him and he sees dad as a contributor. I don't know the situation of course, but just a thought. My husband always reminds our daughter that he's not being mean, he's only trying to help me, and that he tries to get her what she wants whenever he can. She usually accepts it a while after she's done being angry. It's understandable for them to feel that way.

    Answer by jus1jess at 2:23 PM on Mar. 24, 2011

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