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He is Driving me crazy!!!!

We just moved in our own place in january. Things were rocky at his mom house since the beginning. For some reason i thought things will change at least a little bit, but it hasnt. this is our 5th place together. I always do everything i can to get us in an apartment ( looking, deposists and so on) I am due in 4 weeks. since the end of febuary we been aruging and i feel disrespected. He has broke the closet door ( went and bought a new one the next day) cusses me out and i feel unappericated. I get up iron, take my five year old to school ( walk and bus) and manafe to go to school and do my homework ( i have online classes at college) I am tired, bitchy and cant wait til i have this baby. But most of all i dont believe we can make it. we been together for 10 years and i can see a "repeat" forming. He will not leave and get himself together and i am forced in a situation that i need a break from. What do i do? I was thinking that i would not answer the door and act like no one's home. Then maybe he will leave. His name is not on the lease and i told him, this new place was our freash start. But it hasnt been too fresh. He calls his mom for rides, instead of getting on the bus. But i get on the bus everyday, 8 months prego....smh i dont know what to do about this. Then i find an application for an apartment, that jis mom helped him fill out, eith my son's name on it....any suggestions/ Oh yea, when i lock him out, my son will be with him, but i figure they go back by his mom while i contiune to finish up school and get ready for the new baby. I know it sounds crazy but do i deal with the happiness instead?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:06 PM on Mar. 24, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • Thats a hard one I think locking your son out with him isn't the way to go, if anything wait until ur partner goes out then lock ur partner out. In regards to the partner, why haven't you left him sooner? How long has he been treating u this way for?
    sarahandmark09

    Answer by sarahandmark09 at 6:17 PM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • For too long and i am the damn fool, but with a new baby on the way i see that i must change things NOW!! When we split up before i lost my way( drinking and drugs to block the pain) and in some small way i thought with him i would feel better. Now since i been sober and prego i see how the truth. Smh its all my fault i have a tendency to trust the wrong people.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 6:24 PM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • if your serious about leaving him leave just him but don't put your son in a posistion where you may not be able to get him back. you may regret that later. if after 10 yrs of being toegther has told you anything is that he is who he is and that he won't change. i'm sure that there are some state asistance you can get for being a single mother with low income. leave that loser guy in the dust and file for child support for his kids.
    melody77

    Answer by melody77 at 6:29 PM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • I agree with melody, leave him I would. But make sure ur son is with u when u do. Change the locks on ur house ( if it's a rental let the owner no the situation and ask them how to go about changing the locks) call a lawyer and discuss what ur options are for custody of ur son and then get an order made asap so he legally can't take off with ur kids.
    sarahandmark09

    Answer by sarahandmark09 at 6:35 PM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • Custody issues? Right now he is public assitance for our oldest son. He recieves the beneifts and does what he see fits. I changed things over to him so he wouldnt go to jail for back up unpaid child support last year ( yea stupid) so now i must go to court to establish custody anyway. Why would it be so hard to get my son back? and establish 50/50 custody? It is always a big fight over my 5 year old and i want to avoid the drama. Maybe he should go with him and if he wants to come home with his mom, he can. im not abandoning him, i just want to be able to get rid of hgis father without the, where's my dad? Or let my dad in? Or why you lock the door.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 6:42 PM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • Hmmmm probably a bad mistake..... Ok well before u lock him out I would go down and change that. If u to have been together 10yrs I can say 100% that u will have issues with this man in regards to ur kids, he'll most probably have spiteful intentions towards u as well. If I were u I would save guard myself for any situation. I don't no about there, but here in Australia if u don't have a legally binding custody plan in place and ur ex takes off with the kids in "his time" the police can't help u get the kids back. You have to go in and out of court to get him And the kids located then the kids removed from his care. I have been in and out of court for 5 yrs and it's not pretty darl. My daughters father has done a runner with her 3 times in the last four yrs.
    sarahandmark09

    Answer by sarahandmark09 at 6:58 PM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • the OP's last comment sounds fishy to me...i mean she gave the dad custody of her son, so she really has no say what his dad decides to do...anyhow, if he wants to get an apt alone then let him go...you dont want him there anyway...he has all the right to take your son with him...you can change the locks but if hes giving you money for half the expenses or rent then you have to legally evict him...either way good luck
    krazi_beautyful

    Answer by krazi_beautyful at 9:37 PM on Mar. 24, 2011

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