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How do you handle your parents when they don't respect your parenting?

My family and I have certain religious and dietary beliefs/etc and my parents do not respect them at all. They give them the things that we don't eat and they are now talking about taking them to a religious place when we are the opposite of all that.

How do you handle it?

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Asked by AmandaI1021 at 6:59 PM on Mar. 24, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 5 (91 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • Are you giving your parents that much control that they can make decisions like that? I would tell them to back off and become more independant of them.

    Answer by worriedmommy600 at 7:05 PM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • You just need to sit them down, alone, and talk to them about this. Tell them exactly what you said here. Let them know that what they are doing is disrespectful and you wont let it happen anymore. And if they cannot accept the rules YOU set for YOUR children, they wont be seeing them as much. And you wont be leaving them over there to watch without you again.
    While i love my inlaws an parents, sometimes they will do things that they know i do not allow. And i dont make a big deal of it anymore. But i had to have the talk with all of them at some point in my DDs life, and they knew i wasnt messing around. But i also didnt do it in anger or get confrontational. I talked to them like an adult, and reminded them of who was the MOM and who wasnt.
    Now they all respect my rules, and its easy to let them know if something isnt allowed.
    Good luck.

    Answer by Mme.Langley at 7:05 PM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • This may not be what you want to hear . . . but, I just calmly disagree when it is about something HUGE. When it is about little things, I bite my tongue. I feel like I owe them respect because they raised and nurtured me . . . and I don't know how much longer they will have here with us . . . I would rather have more of them right now than less.

    Some of my fondest memories when I was young are of my maternal grandma. I know her and my mom disagreed about tons, but, when push comes to shove, she was a shining light for me. I want my kids to have that experience with my parents, so I suck it up . . . (even though it sometimes bothers the holy moly out of me).

    Answer by ImaginationMama at 7:06 PM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • For your reasons is the exact same reason I don't talk to either of my parents.

    Example: My dad would be tickling my son (he's 7). My son would say: Stop Grampa, I don't want to be tickled anymore. Grampa wouldn't stop so I'd step in and TELL Grampa to stop now; only to get rolled eyes (from my dad) and he still wouldn't stop.

    My mother is just a bitch and would only call us to borrow our car, never to really interact with her only two grandkids. THEN, she had the audacity to accuse me of only calling her when I needed something. UGH!

    Answer by Rosehawk at 7:21 PM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • I had an issue with my parents not respecting my parenting when I first had my twins, 5 years ago. I told them, and everyone else I had to, that I was their mother, and I will parent the way I feel is right. It took telling them a few times, but they finally got it. Sometimes I still have to remind them, but for the most part they are doing better.

    Answer by fallnangel93 at 7:44 PM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • just tell them thank you for your input and I will put it into consideration bu this is my child and will raise it as I see fit

    Answer by Christmaslver68 at 11:08 AM on Mar. 25, 2011

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