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I'm at a loss here- need suggestions pretty plz (w/ a cherry on top)!!!!

My 3rd grade dau is very sweet & sensitive. I've given her advice on how to stick up for herself to the "mean girls" at school, but she hasnt had the years of crap to jade her outlook on things, to help her muster up the nerve to use that advice. (God love her!) So I tried telling her to tell them, "When you say or do ___, it hurts my feelings, and I know you wouldn't want that would you." (Mind you the advice I gave to her about standing up was not being mean back, just being strong & standing up to them- but she just doesnt have it in her to say what I've suggested) What other suggestions do you wise ladies have when dealing w/ this "mean girl" crap?


Asked by mrsmom110 at 7:56 PM on Mar. 24, 2011 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

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Answers (8)
  • I told my daughter to tell them....

    "HEY, THAT IS NOT COOL!" and then ignore them....they are searching for attention....

    She has used it & it works. My DD has even used this to stick up for other kids. I love that she won't stand by & watch someone else get picked on. She always says something to help out.

    Gosh....some kids are so mean!

    Answer by samurai_chica at 8:04 PM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • ignore them, they hate it when you act like they don't exist


    Answer by dancinintherain at 7:57 PM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • Talk to the teacher and get help (the principal too maybe). This is such a young age and very hard for a child to handle it alone. I'm sorry this is happening to her.

    Answer by elizabr at 7:58 PM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • My 9 year old sounds a lot like yours. I tell her that to tell the other kids "Mind your own business" when they start in on something. It applies to almost every situation that kids harp on each other about, whether it's making fun of what she brought for lunch or talking about the shoes she has on or telling her she shouldn't be friends with so-and-so, and on and on and on. It works pretty well--simple, to the point, and not a whole lot of room for argument.

    Answer by vicesix at 8:51 PM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • That "You hurt my feelings" crap doesn't work on mean girls. They don't give a rip about anyone's feelings or they wouldn't be the mean girls. KIWM? I've taught my daughter better come backs, which might also be mean, but at least it's something the mean girls would understand.
    For example:
    Mean girls: You're fat.
    Response: Yeah, but you're ugly, and I can lose weight.

    Yes, it's stooping to their level, but when talking to idiots, it's necessary.

    Answer by Pnukey at 1:05 PM on Mar. 27, 2011

  • I would tell her to ignore them and make sure she understands that what they are saying is not true.

    Answer by MooNFaeRie30 at 5:52 AM on Mar. 30, 2011

  • They will probably just make fun of her for saying that. What exactly are they picky on her for?

    Answer by Aimers55 at 8:01 PM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • I hate to say it but I agree with pnukey

    Answer by mommythree0508 at 1:45 AM on Mar. 29, 2011