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How did you know when you were ready to be with someone?

I got out of a 4 year relationship 15 months ago. We shut off ALL contact in January (he is the father of my kids) I know I have NO feelings for him. I just started talking to a childhood friend, and I have been hanging out with his mom and sister a lot lately. I grew up with them. My 2yo dd calls his mom 'grandma' which melted my heart. I don't know if this is real or not, or if i'm just looking for comfort from a male since the breakup. How can you tell?

 
knicole0708

Asked by knicole0708 at 10:26 PM on Mar. 24, 2011 in Relationships

Level 23 (17,012 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (4)
  • I think you really just kind of know. I dated off and on after my divorce but always felt like I wasn't quite ready for it. I'd stopped dating for...oh, probably 4 yrs, I think it was, when I met my SO. And when I met him, I knew pretty much instantly that I wanted to be with him. I had just decided I only wanted to date casually, and when we found each other, dating casually got thrown right out the window. I never questioned whether or not I was ready, I just dove in.

    I think if you're questioning it, you could be either not ready or just scared. The only way to know for sure is to do some serious soul searching. It doesn't hurt to do some soul searching anyway, so you can figure out what you want from your next relationship and what you won't tolerate.
    wendythewriter

    Answer by wendythewriter at 10:10 AM on Mar. 25, 2011

  • I think that if it is right you will know and not have to ask. That is the best way to describe it. I has sworn off trying to date or even find someone when I was introduced to my SO. I knew with in days of meeting him that he was the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.
    coala

    Answer by coala at 10:29 PM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • I don't think there necessarily has to be a separation between having the comfort from a male and it being real feelings or it being friendship. I think that in a "real" relationship, the person is all of these things to you.

    Do you get giddy when you see him? Miss him when he is away? Talk to him everyday? Have times that you know you will be together every week? (i.e...is it implied that you will be doing something every weekend?) Are you affectionate with each other? That sort of thing!
    Mom-2-3-Girlz

    Answer by Mom-2-3-Girlz at 11:05 PM on Mar. 24, 2011

  • If you have to ask then maybe its not....
    terep001

    Answer by terep001 at 1:17 AM on Mar. 25, 2011

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