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Is it rude to decline an offer to be in someone's wedding?

I live across the country and i tried to explain but they didn't seem to care.


Asked by Mel_in_PHX at 12:30 AM on Mar. 25, 2011 in Relationships

Level 19 (6,704 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • I think people who are getting married sometimes only see their point of view and don't realize that other people have things going on in their lives as well. If they are going to pay for it or help out how they can they you should at least try but if you have legitimate reasons to not be able to go then you are fine.

    Answer by dbodani at 1:41 AM on Mar. 25, 2011

  • I don't think it's rude when it's an unrealistic expectation and you have a legitimate reason to decline.

    Answer by FluffyMamaBunny at 12:33 AM on Mar. 25, 2011

  • Unless they want to pay for you to come down and be there, how is it rude?

    Answer by Musicmom80 at 12:57 AM on Mar. 25, 2011

  • It depends on how and why you do it. If you do it just because you don't really care for the person, I would say yes. But then If you don't care for them it wouldn't matter much to you. If there was a reason such as you have small children and no babysitter, then no.

    Answer by MommyShannon90 at 12:33 AM on Mar. 25, 2011

  • its my brother and he lives across the country. his wedding is during the school year which makes it even harder for my family. im sure i will be able to go but i don't know about my family.

    Comment by Mel_in_PHX (original poster) at 12:37 AM on Mar. 25, 2011

  • Not rude at all, you have very valid reasons. It's extremely rude and selfish of your brother to not understand that though.

    Answer by GomezMami2908 at 12:46 AM on Mar. 25, 2011

  • Hmm... if it's your brother, maybe. If you know you're going to be able to go, why don't you want to be in it? Is it inconvenience, or is there something between you two that is keeping you apart?

    Answer by Adelicious at 12:47 AM on Mar. 25, 2011

  • i just don't want to disappoint them if i can't make it to the bachelorette party, bridal shower, rehearsal dinner, ect...

    Comment by Mel_in_PHX (original poster) at 12:49 AM on Mar. 25, 2011

  • It's not rude. You have very legitmate reasons for not being able to attend. Hopefully your brother and his soon to be wife will understand that.

    Answer by meooma at 8:39 AM on Mar. 25, 2011

  • It's not rude. Thank them for asking, tell them you will make as many events as you can, and politely decline being one of the attendants.

    Answer by elizabr at 8:51 AM on Mar. 25, 2011