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How do I get my father in law to get help for my mother in law who has dementia?

Fil is not a pleasant person. My Mil has dementia and needs care. Fil will not let anyone come in to his house to care for her no believe he has enough money to have her go to an assisted living facility. We have tried everything and he won't budge.

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Asked by Anonymous at 12:21 PM on Mar. 26, 2011 in Health

Answers (4)
  • If he is doing a good job taking care of her let him be, if not, appeal to his reasonable side.

    Answer by older at 12:30 PM on Mar. 26, 2011

  • If she is alright then leave them alone for now. Once it gets real bad you can always go to court and get permission to make medical choices for her. Judges wont do that though unless and until fil shows he isnt caring for her and she is at some risk by being at home. By risk I mean not being fed, not eating on her, now taking medication etc.

    Answer by gemgem at 12:33 PM on Mar. 26, 2011

  • you may have to call Adult Protective Services, you can do that and keep it so that he does not know you called. If your concerns are grounded they can force him to get care for her.

    Answer by ElenaC419 at 12:34 PM on Mar. 26, 2011

  • She fell today and after 2 hours of trying to get her up we called my husband to come help. He told his dad to call 911, but he wouldn't. It's important to have professionals lift someone who has fallen and is fragile. So my husband called l911. They were able to get her up into bed and assess her. She was alright and didn't need to go the hospital. But they told my husband she should really be in long turn care. No kidding. Fil was pretty mad, but we at least got an assessment of her.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 7:14 PM on Mar. 27, 2011

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