Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

What do you do when your in laws never come to see your kids?

My SIL and her son lives with them, and they do everything for this kid. I love him, but it's just sad to see as grandparents they aren't doing much of anything with their OTHER grandchildren.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 12:41 PM on Mar. 26, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (16)
  • There is really nothing you can do but voice your concerns.. It is their loss..

    Answer by midnightmoma at 12:43 PM on Mar. 26, 2011

  • We hear all the time about where they do and what they do with him and wonder why our kids have to go without grandparents? When we do make the effort and go over, they are busy doing things. I'm just so sad. My parents are across the country and cry because they hardly ever get to see them except in pictures and when they can afford to visit.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:44 PM on Mar. 26, 2011

  • Nothing. It's their loss.

    Answer by Izsarejman at 12:45 PM on Mar. 26, 2011

  • Speak up and tell them how you feel.. If that doesn't change things just do with your kids.. You can't make them get involved which is sad because the kids see it also..

    Answer by midnightmoma at 12:46 PM on Mar. 26, 2011

  • Pay for their plane ticket to come out...cuz its cheaper to fly them out than to take a road trip up to see them...

    Sorry, but midnightmoma is right. Its their loss. The only reason why grandparents aren't in our kids' lives is because one set lives ~18 hr drive (minus kids), and the other ~13 hr drive (again, minus kids...add about 5-6 hrs, possibly more, with 4 kids). My mom is able to come up once a year in the summer time to see her grandkids (and her favorite daughter) if we can't make it down there, but the in-laws lives are pretty much chaotic and its hard for them to get away at the same time :/

    Answer by hopeandglory53 at 12:46 PM on Mar. 26, 2011

  • We don't have the money or we would be commuting as much as we could!

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:47 PM on Mar. 26, 2011

  • My dad lives 15 minutes... I saw him for the first time in about 2 months last night because I loaded up my 3 and 18 month old to go make a point to see him. My mother lives half the year 7 hours away, and the other half 2 hours away... She may come visit twice a year. its so sad, I was an only child and had all there attention growing up.. then my father went on his middle life crisis and divorced my mom. Now he is re married and they are fighting for custody of his new wifes 8 year old daughter.... so all he is concerend about is that. Its sucks, I cry about it at night... They are missing so much.

    Answer by MKSers at 12:49 PM on Mar. 26, 2011

  • There is not much you can do, I am in the same boat. they live 20 minutes away and think we need to come there. but they come to town for shopping but never stop.

    Answer by jenn4443 at 12:58 PM on Mar. 26, 2011

  • It's beyond your control. And it's not mentally damaging to not have grandparents on one side or the other. I don't care if my MIL likes us or not, and yes she does favor my neice and nephew, but I really don't care. I have plenty of other family that love my kids. I think it bothers the adults more than the kids, and we tend to project it on to our kids. I prefer to focus all of my energy on the people who choose to be in their lives.

    Answer by Musicmom80 at 12:59 PM on Mar. 26, 2011

  • music, they are our only family here. There is no one else, or I may not care that much.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 1:04 PM on Mar. 26, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.