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Husband problems..... adult content

so i have a question for the married ladies..... whoever wants to answer. I cant seem to get my husband to spend more time at home with me and our son... on his days off all he wants to do is go golfing or run around and do something else.... All I want is some more quality time with him and some more help with our son considering I do most of the work with him and wake up with the baby all night.... anyone else ever have this problem? also... lately he has not been in the mood for sex (thats what he says) and Im really confused because I thought we were both looking forward to being able to do it after the 6 weeks after having our son had passed but still no sex.... what do I do?

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jbrogdon5

Asked by jbrogdon5 at 5:27 PM on Mar. 26, 2011 in Relationships

Level 3 (17 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • As far as dh spending time away, yes it seem like he looks for reason to be gone these days. We are not getting along so well right now.
    I have heard that men's sex drive can decrease after a baby, it a hormone thing that is natures way of letting the mom heal. I personally did not experience this, DH seemed way to interested even with a baby crying in the bassinet beside our bed.
    Graciesmom528

    Answer by Graciesmom528 at 5:33 PM on Mar. 26, 2011

  • I know my hubs had a bit of an emotional issue to deal with after the birth of our first child.... I had always been this sexy little thing that he loved to get naked and have fun with .... but now I was the mother of his child and he had me on such a high pedestal that it was hard for him to think of me in a sexy way. Not because he didnt find me attractive... but because I was now some one's mother. It took a while for him to really get fisty... we had to make 'love' those first couple times.. it had to be ultra romantic and very calm.


    He is over that now.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:34 PM on Mar. 26, 2011

  • ive never experienced that with my husband but my advice to you is be patient , i wouldnt jump the gun just yet on anything. sit down and have a talk with him , let him know exactly how u feel.
    PrettyBaby24

    Answer by PrettyBaby24 at 5:37 PM on Mar. 26, 2011

  • thanks everyone
    jbrogdon5

    Comment by jbrogdon5 (original poster) at 5:43 PM on Mar. 26, 2011

  • I am pregnant with our third, and I don't think mine comprehends that help throughout the day is important to me AND the kids. He likes to say things like "It isn't like I can nurse the baby, what is the point of both of us being here/up". I don't think he "gets" that if he were home for the day, I would be able to sleep when the baby sleeps like I need to, and that our older kids would have the attention they need.

    As far as sex, I would be hurt by that too. After all my births, it took ME a few months to be ready again. If this is your first, maybe he is worried that it wont be the same or that he will hurt you. But honestly, I am not sure how "in the mood" I would be if I felt like he was gone all the time and didn't want to be home with me.
    Mom-2-3-Girlz

    Answer by Mom-2-3-Girlz at 5:51 PM on Mar. 26, 2011

  • This is strang but reading your email leads me to think that you need to be concerned and watch him, six weeks without sex for a man NOT! and now that you can and he still dont want to,,,,,,hum he might be getting it elsewhere and going places alone Hummmm....do a little detective work like check his phone log when he isnt looking his text messaging and calls he makes to the same number. Write them down and call them and ask how they know your husband.
    Demand you go with him on errands so you all can be together,,,make excuse why you want to go and see his reaction and what he says..sooner or later if he is cheating you will find out. I do that now to my Husband because I don't trust him due to a female issue some time back always be on guard and never say your man won't cheat because the first time you do he will....good luck
    dusty1962

    Answer by dusty1962 at 6:00 PM on Mar. 26, 2011

  • Dusty, my husband has been without sex for nine months and I assure you, he is perfectly happy, mainly because he prizes me and the health of our unborn child more than he cares about his jollies, so not every man is as shallow and self-absorbed as you make out. It's completely ridiculous for you to project your unhappy situation onto someone whom you do not know from Adam's housecat and in all honesty, I find it reprehensible that you'd lead this poor woman down the garden path to Paranoid Town where you hang your hat.
    Fistandantalus

    Answer by Fistandantalus at 6:12 PM on Mar. 26, 2011

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