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2 Bumps

Custody Agreement?

I have really every considered getting one before, but my twins' father's girlfriend really hates me.

I just now considered this, and I need help?

Will he get mad?

Will he hurt my girls? I don't think he would, but these are all things to think about, right?

Maybe I'm just over-reacting, but its ALL too serious!

Answer Question
 
GraciesMommy464

Asked by GraciesMommy464 at 11:53 PM on Mar. 26, 2011 in Relationships

Level 10 (469 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • whats best for the kids
    letstalk747

    Answer by letstalk747 at 11:55 PM on Mar. 26, 2011

  • I am lost. Why would you get a custody agreement because you don't get along with his girlfriend?
    mommy_of_two388

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 12:00 AM on Mar. 27, 2011

  • If you and yur childrens bf still get along and can work together you dont need a co. However if there is alot of fighting going on or threatening then by all means get an agreement in riting you can both live with. Dont make this all about his girlfriend .
    katcb1019

    Answer by katcb1019 at 12:04 AM on Mar. 27, 2011

  • if u feel as tho he may run with them yes. if u feel they are in anger u need a protection order not custody aggreement
    LindasueDa

    Answer by LindasueDa at 12:19 AM on Mar. 27, 2011

  • If I am understanding correctly, you are worried that he would stop just doing what you all are used to doing and use the children as a way to retaliate against you?

    If you have any fear at all of these things, I would definitely get a custody agreement in writing and on file...preferably that resembles what you were used to doing before she became involved so he doesn't feel like he is getting short changed and the kids still feel like they're doing their same normal things.
    Mom-2-3-Girlz

    Answer by Mom-2-3-Girlz at 12:30 AM on Mar. 27, 2011

  • I think most girlfriends don't like the boyfriends ex-wifes. But if it hasn't been long maybe it's because she doesn't know you, or you don't know her yet. Don't assume the worst unless it comes to that. If you want things in writing, you are entitled to that. Whether it be child support or visitation.
    amessageofhope

    Answer by amessageofhope at 1:13 AM on Mar. 27, 2011

  • good luck what a tough issue
    ChanQ

    Answer by ChanQ at 1:16 AM on Mar. 27, 2011

  • The father's gf not liking you isn't a reason to "stir the pot" with your ex. Now, if you write down the current arrangment and both sign it, sure. But if you are talking about limiting his time or taking him to court over it, you're just going to cause trouble. I always feel it's best to have things in writing, but if you are wanting to change the current arrangement simply because the gf doesn't like you, I think that's a bad idea.
    laird6372

    Answer by laird6372 at 6:38 AM on Mar. 27, 2011

  • His girlfriend doesn't like you...what does that have to do with your twins? Is she taking her dislike of you out on them? Is she trying to stop him from seeing your girls? If she's trying to stop him, a custody agreement won't force him to keep seeing them - he can just ignore it. If she's taking her dislike out on them, again a custody agreement won't stop that - unless it stipulates she can't be around them, but at this point, you probably won't be able to get that.

    If you just feel that it would be better to have it in writing, then go for it. I'd do as someone else suggested and just write down what you currently do and both of you sign it. You can file it with the courts then, but it's more amiable that way. Taking him to court to change it or make a big fuss will not be good for anyone. The kids will be upset, your ex will get mad at you, and the girlfriend will hate you more. Lose/lose for everyone.
    wendythewriter

    Answer by wendythewriter at 8:50 AM on Mar. 27, 2011

  • whatever is best for the kids, i don't think he would hurt your girls unless he has in the past or is a violent person, but the custody thing is between you and exh not ex's gf, he needs to draw some boundaries for her
    tirelessefforts

    Answer by tirelessefforts at 11:37 AM on Mar. 27, 2011

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