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What to do about a husband who always says he's sorry but will do the exact same things over like a million times that he said sorry for?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:49 PM on Nov. 26, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • depends on what it is
    BlueFrogMama

    Answer by BlueFrogMama at 9:50 PM on Nov. 26, 2008

  • Repeated appologies followed by repeated behavior is a bad sign. I had this in my first marriage. It just means he appologizes to tell you what you want to hear and does what he wants to do anyway. So far he's been getting away with it because you are accepting it.

    I just couldn't live with someone I couldn't trust anymore. I'm worn out.
    pugpin

    Answer by pugpin at 9:55 PM on Nov. 26, 2008

  • If your relationship is otherwise good, I'd sit him down and tell him you know he keeps saying he's sorry, but then continues the behavior. Tell him this hurts you and makes you not trust him. Maybe he doesn't see what he is doing....lol...give him the benefit of the doubt until you tell him how you feel and see what he says about it.
    robinann5

    Answer by robinann5 at 10:25 PM on Nov. 26, 2008

  • I'd tell him to stop saying he's sorry and show me he's sorry by not doing it repeatedly.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:37 PM on Nov. 26, 2008

  • when you find out let me know
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:20 AM on Nov. 27, 2008

  • It would depend on what he keeps doing and then appologizing for. Doing this with, for example, forgetting to take out the garbage is IMO not something to get upset about but if it's something like abuse or cheating than that's a different story. Alot of women don't understand men and how their minds work. Men can't multi-task and organize like women (at least the majority of them). While we can hold a million things in our mental to-do list, men can only concentrate and work on one thing at a time. If his forgetting or doing then appologizing is something minor then my advice would be to cut him some slack.
    MrsHart6

    Answer by MrsHart6 at 12:27 AM on Nov. 27, 2008

  • if he says I'm sorry and farts and says i'm sorry give him an antacid, if he cheats and says I'm sorry and cheats and says i'm sorry maybe what he is sorry about is that he got caught. Get my drift.
    Theoneandonly

    Answer by Theoneandonly at 4:20 AM on Nov. 27, 2008

  • Can you give us an example? My hubby used to always apologize for forgetting to do a chore/errand so I warned him that the next time he "forgot", I'd be hiring a cleaning service, which he was vehemently opposed to; he never "forgot" again.

    Years ago, when he'd "forget" to call if he was going to be late, I cancelled his cell phone service because, IMO, he didn't need a cell phone since he didn't use it for the purpose it was intended for. He got the message loud and clear. I think actions speak louder than words with men but I also think they say things they don't mean because it shuts us up ... don't shut up; call him on it.

    Now, if you're talking about something more serious like cheating or abuse, that's a whole other story.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:04 AM on Nov. 27, 2008

  • No ot's not for simple, little things such as chores, it's for more serious things. I do tell him. I've yelled, compromised and everything I know to do. He is aware how I feel and he knows I expect him to show me he's sorry if he says it. He's just not doing anything about it. I'm sick of it and I don't know any other options besides leaving...but i'd prefer another option before I go that way. I think he has potential and I want to work it out but he's not.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:50 AM on Nov. 27, 2008

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