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2 Bumps

I am getting married next month

and my dad wants my step mother to share the mother of the bride role with my mom. He feels this is fair since my step dad is sharing the father of the bride role. BUT my mom and step dad got married when I was 6, he is just as much my dad as my dad is. My dad has only been married to my step mom for 3 years and I am 21 so I was an adult when that happened plus they moved out of state right after. My and my fiance' are paying for the wedding. My mom and future mother in law will be wearing a dusty pink, I have asked my SM not to wear that color. Also, I would like my mom, step dad, dad and my 3 living grandparents to sit at the brides parents table and my SM to sit with my aunts and uncles and another table and at the ceremony I want my 3 parents and 2 brothers to sit in the front row on the bride's side and her to sit in the second row. Basically, I just want her to be another guest but she seems to assume that she is gonna be a mother of the bride. My dad says I am being selfish but I think she is, why would she think that she deserves to share the role with my mother when I hardly know her? Am I wrong?


Asked by Anonymous at 4:18 PM on Mar. 27, 2011 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (19)
  • Just remember this is your day and nothing can ruin it everyone who says you are rude needs to back off don't let anyone make demand on your wedding i ended up catering to my MIL and she nearly ruined my wedding. It's like you said this woman has only been in your life for three year (and out of state except for two visits) and really is only a guest yes she married your father but that doesn't make her your mother and she shouldn't try to take away something precious like sharing in the MOB role of your wedding she didn't raise you and she's childish to try and make it all about her hope your day goes without problems good luck and congrats :D

    Answer by krissii at 4:47 AM on Apr. 5, 2011

  • I can see your opinion about her not sharing the mother role, BUT I think it's crappy of you to not let her sit with your main family during the ceremony and with her husband during the meal. How does she treat you? Is she a complete bitch, never gets to know you , or tries to make nice conversation and is cordial, gives you nice gifts at holidays, etc? ...If it's the latter you need to accept the fact she is family and does try.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:25 PM on Mar. 27, 2011

  • No I agree with you on this. I can see how her feelings can be hurt but like you said you barley know her.

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 4:20 PM on Mar. 27, 2011

  • oh and of course you should let her sit with her husband. It would be bad to not allow her to sit net to her husband. Doesn she know all you aunts well that she would be confortable sitting there? Other that that I would think its a little rude to not let her sit next to her husband. But like I said in my other post if you dont want her up front in there ceremony taht fine and understandable.

    Answer by LittleBirdFly at 4:29 PM on Mar. 27, 2011

  • you can't squeeze ONE more chair in at the table? Your dad is not going to be happy being sat somewhere else away from his wife

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 5:53 PM on Mar. 27, 2011

  • Wow, really? Just because you don't want her to share the role as MOB, why should she have to sit with all the other regular guests? That is indeed pretty rude, if you ask me. She is still part of your immediate family, a parental unit.

    Answer by rio_burb at 8:28 PM on Mar. 27, 2011

  • hmmm seems pretty rude just my opinion butits your wedding...

    Answer by kylansmommy09 at 4:22 PM on Mar. 27, 2011

  • kyalnsmommy09, no i am not trying to be rude or sarcastic, I really want to know, if you were my mother, would you be ok with sharing the mother of the bride role with someone who had no hand in raising me and really has never done anything for me?

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 4:23 PM on Mar. 27, 2011

  • no do not let this become about her it is your day let her know how its going to be! Congrats!!

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 4:24 PM on Mar. 27, 2011

  • Its about YOU not them on this day. Thats what lots of family's forget. I understand you but maybe you Dad doesnt like it that he has to shrae his role in the wedding and thats why hes saying that? If you not colese with her and dont wanna do this then dont and tell him why, explaine to him and her why you want it that way. I honestly wouldnt do it either.

    Answer by LittleBirdFly at 4:26 PM on Mar. 27, 2011

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