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New to the board...Need advice.

Hi everyone, my name is Leslie and I am going through a seperation from a man that I have known for 15yrs. We have been sep. since July. We have a sep. aggreement and the one holiday that he gets is Thanksgiving. Now eveyone knows that Thanksgiving is tomorrow. I haven't heard a word about it since the aggrement was signed 4 mths. ago. He hasn't said anything and neither have I. My inlaws are not close at all to my daughter so needless to say she is not comfortable around them. never was. My daughter will not go anywhere without me. Not even with her father. My family would love to have us go there and Sophia is close to everyone of them cause she sees them all the time. I guess I want to know do I go with my family? Stay home and have a nice Holiday with me and Sophia? If I don't here from him do I bring it up after the fact. Any help is appreciated. Thx,

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:38 PM on Nov. 26, 2008 in Holidays

Answers (7)
  • i think you should call him in the morning, to make sure he's not planning on coming to get her. if you weren't there, he'd likely raise a stink. if he hasn't mentioned it, he's prob not coming, but to be on the safeside and avoid a confrontation later, possibly in court, i'd call.
    thehairnazi

    Answer by thehairnazi at 11:42 PM on Nov. 26, 2008

  • i say you go to your family. if he hasnt bothered to call thats his problem.
    MommaBear1129

    Answer by MommaBear1129 at 11:43 PM on Nov. 26, 2008

  • Yeah i wouldn't call him. If he actually wanted her he would've called by now. Go and have fun with your family.
    sarapurser

    Answer by sarapurser at 11:48 PM on Nov. 26, 2008

  • Not your fault that he isn't taking care of his end. It is not your responsibility to see to it that he gets his daughter when he is supposed to have her. Now if you were preventing it that would be different, however he is the one that dropped the ball. Go to your family and enjoy your holiday.
    norbert

    Answer by norbert at 11:54 PM on Nov. 26, 2008

  • I say call first or stay home with your daughter. If you go, you could get in alot of trouble if he says something about it, even when he didn't really have the intention of coming to get her. I would think you need his agreement to take her just to save you grief later.
    momofpurebliss

    Answer by momofpurebliss at 12:37 AM on Nov. 27, 2008

  • Was there a certain time he was supposed to pick her up? Usually there is some type of time frame, like either picking her up at such and such time and having her back by a certain time as well. You can't just wait around on him, and guess if he is going to come or not. He can't expect to pick her up at 2 in the afternoon and let you wait around till he feels like picking her up.
    Alma_C

    Answer by Alma_C at 8:43 AM on Nov. 27, 2008

  • Sorry to say you can;t go back on an agreement when it comes to the children..You need to find out if he is coming. If not, then join your family..if he is, then you have to let her go. was this a written agreement or verbal? If it's just a verbal, I we "rewrite" the contract and let him know you want the holidays because she doesn't feel comfortable aorund his family. He can have her another time.
    But for now you neede to honor what you said.
    nazratred

    Answer by nazratred at 1:48 PM on Nov. 27, 2008

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