Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

Question for moms of children who have special needs, learning disabilities, etc.

Does it ever bother you when you hear other moms talking about their child's accomplishments and how they did this by 18 months or they did this at 3 years old, etc?

I'll be honest. It did use to bother me. I would feel a little bit jealous and would often avoid these conversations with other moms. I have come to embrace my son's abilities on what he can do and work with him on what he can't do. Anyone else like this?

Answer Question
 
JeremysMom

Asked by JeremysMom at 11:03 PM on Mar. 27, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 35 (75,344 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • OH YEAH . my daughter was born with a cleft palate so she had serious speech delays (still does) it is very hard. I had a friend who would always talk about how her daughter was already talking at 15 months and could say her ABCs by 2 years and count to ten. She wasn't trying to brag she was just being excited as a parent like any parent would but it was hard for me. I have learned to trust that my DD will catch up eventually and to be thankful she does not face deeper challenges so far. Plus she has a great personality, so sweet and loving. i'd take that over a chatterbox anyday :)
    kayslay

    Answer by kayslay at 11:07 PM on Mar. 27, 2011

  • Well yes, I know what you mean! My son has a speech delay and I see the same thing in my other son. It seems like other kids can converse just fine and mine can't! Well, since my oldest has been in school and done speech therapy, he's done really well and can converse a lot better! I am going into special education because I have experience with handicapped and i am familair with it from the parent's perspective as well. Although my children don't display any learning disabilities so far, it's very hard when you feel like your kid has to go through the struggle and humilation of being different. I really know what you mean! Every child has the right to an improved quality of life though and I think being a good parent is a big part of that! We have to act like it doesn't bother us, so they don't ever have to feel strange about it either. Know what I mean?
    lowencope

    Answer by lowencope at 11:08 PM on Mar. 27, 2011

  • My daughter has delays due to her brain tumor-- she didnt walk til 2yrs old- and developmentally she is about 10mos delayed.. It never really affected me-- she is who she is and I celebrate her accomplishments, never once have I compared them to other kids-- or got down because a child her age does something before her.. she is almost 4yrs old ( 4 in July) and is only now potty training-- and I am the proudest mama in the world!!
    paigesmommy5264

    Answer by paigesmommy5264 at 11:23 PM on Mar. 27, 2011

  • I know what you mean. My son is 3 and his speech is nowhere near where it should be. He was also slow crawling/walking. Even though we did tummy time. We have found a speech therapist to help and a school that helps kids with special needs. It does get frustrating for me to hear other moms talking about how early their child did this or that. I try my best to not let it bother me but its hard. Then again I think that even though my son doesn't talk it doesn't mean he is unique or special in other ways if that makes sense. But I see my son as the handsome boy he is. We help him in any way we can.
    tnvplus2

    Answer by tnvplus2 at 12:29 AM on Mar. 28, 2011

  • As a mother of a disabled daughter I applaud you all on how well you're handling your special needs children. My daughter is now 30 years old and I found out she was 'special' when she was about 3. It can be a long, tough road, especially having to deal with other people, but I've always looked at my daughter as who she is, and that is April. She's my only child and is at about a 9-12 age level. She also didn't talk and that was the first thing we noticed. Now, she never shuts up! I couldn't imagine her being other than who she is and if it's a help to any of you other Moms, just know that the ride is soooo wonderful, hard, fun, heartbreaking, scary, exhilarating, tiring, frustrating, joyful... you get the picture. My April is the love of my life.

    JeannieBee

    Answer by JeannieBee at 5:34 AM on Mar. 28, 2011

  • Love this ~ As a mother of a disabled daughter I applaud you all on how well you're handling your special needs children. My daughter is now 30 years old and I found out she was 'special' when she was about 3. It can be a long, tough road, especially having to deal with other people, but I've always looked at my daughter as who she is, and that is April. She's my only child and is at about a 9-12 age level. She also didn't talk and that was the first thing we noticed. Now, she never shuts up! I couldn't imagine her being other than who she is and if it's a help to any of you other Moms, just know that the ride is soooo wonderful, hard, fun, heartbreaking, scary, exhilarating, tiring, frustrating, joyful... you get the picture.

    My son is turning 21 in a couple months. However, I have 6 children total! They are all individuals, with strengths and weeknesses! Embarrassing the GOOD is the key! Attitude is everything :o)
    JoyIsAnAttitude

    Answer by JoyIsAnAttitude at 1:17 PM on Mar. 29, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN