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Is this right?

My husband' s gramma passed away last year in Mass. where most of the family lives. (we are in texas) Years ago, when his grampa passed, 2 of the family members flew his ashes to Cal. where they had lived before, to scatter his ashes on a mountain. There were a few family mbrs still in Cali
His family in Mass held a "benefit" last night, a spaghetti supper at $10 a ticket, to "pay to have their angel taken to her final resting place" Basically, the family wanted to raise enough money for them all to take a car trip to take Gramma's ashes to this mountain so they could spread them in the same place as her husbands. My husband said he never heard of his gramma wanting this and thinks that they did this so they could all get a free trip to Cali. I really dont care why they did it, it just seems very tacky to me. There were several people on the bebefit's FB page questioning how this was supposed to benefit the deceased. Anyway, my question to you all is...tacky or not, and is this even legal? We dont have anything to do with my husband's family, btw...

 
shivasgirl

Asked by shivasgirl at 11:08 PM on Mar. 27, 2011 in Relationships

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Answers (7)
  • Sorry...I misread this to be that this happened much more recently! A year afterward, come on!
    Mom-2-3-Girlz

    Answer by Mom-2-3-Girlz at 11:23 PM on Mar. 27, 2011

  • sounds pretty tacky to me
    pregoagain2010

    Answer by pregoagain2010 at 11:38 PM on Mar. 27, 2011

  • I imagine that it is legal, and they aren't lying to folks. I think that people have the obligation to satisfy themselves with where the money is going, and if they can convince people that it is a worthwhile donation to make, who is to stop them.

    Personally, if it were me, I MIGHT have asked for donations for funeral expenses in lieu of flowers...and USED the money FOR that purpose...and if I were able to afford to go on my own to do what I wanted with the ashes after I paid the rest of the funeral, then and only then would I go to take care of the ashes the way I wanted to. After all, they really can do that any time. It is not urgent the way a funeral is.
    Mom-2-3-Girlz

    Answer by Mom-2-3-Girlz at 11:22 PM on Mar. 27, 2011

  • thats what we said, I think they just want a vacay... I even told his aunt that the ashes could be sent thru the mail to the sister that lives there, she said, "No, we all want to take her"
    shivasgirl

    Comment by shivasgirl (original poster) at 11:34 PM on Mar. 27, 2011

  • just looking for opinions rose
    shivasgirl

    Comment by shivasgirl (original poster) at 1:00 AM on Mar. 28, 2011

  • No, sounds like they have motives if Grandma never requested her ashes to be in that particular place. It's odd to have a benefit for her if it's really benefiting the family's expenses. Quite tacky, indeed.
    rio_burb

    Answer by rio_burb at 9:29 AM on Mar. 28, 2011

  • Who cares? I mean does any of this really matter to you hun? Let it go and leave all the nonsense behind. Not everyone has motives. Think the best if you can about all people!
    rosetoes

    Answer by rosetoes at 12:58 AM on Mar. 28, 2011

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