Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

Some new discipline ideas for a lazy 8 year old.

I used to be a spanking mom but as I have matured as a mother I have decided to get away from that sort of discipline technique. It hasnt made much difference in changing behaviors. My 8 year old has a serious lack of motivation to do anything correctly. i dont expect perfection but I am seeing not one Iota of effort at all. This afternoon he was asked to fold his clothes and put them away and as always he has simply crammed them all into his dresser. I have made so much effort to try to teach him how to be Semi organized, as much as an 8 year old could be, with nothing but resistance, resistance, resistance. What can we do tonight that will make him regret having blatently disobeying?
Sentences? push ups? I need some ideas please I am not good at this. (As is obvious since Im not taken very seriously at this moment)

I do not want my son to go on any longer on this "I do what I feel like" attitude. My old self would just march in there with a paddle but I am trying to be an effective parent without hitting.

Answer Question

Asked by SaturnsMom at 8:47 PM on Mar. 28, 2011 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 12 (920 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • Wish I had some ideas for you, but I don't. Since it has no answers yet I'm going to bump it and wish you best of luck!

    Answer by CollegeMommy121 at 8:58 PM on Mar. 28, 2011

  • Are there any incentives in place for him if he does follow thru on his chores? Sometimes if we offer something, than children can be more motivated to do what is expected of them

    Answer by virginiamama71 at 8:59 PM on Mar. 28, 2011

  • Virginiamama71 he has been promised to have his tv put back into his room if he could start following directions better. It has been for naught. I guess he isnt interested. Plus I dont want to cross the line over into bribery.

    Comment by SaturnsMom (original poster) at 9:04 PM on Mar. 28, 2011

  • Most 8-year olds I know are not capable of folding and putting away their clothes without assistance. Perhaps your son isn't lazy at all. Maybe he's just expected to do things that he does not yet have the ability to do, and he is extremely frustrated. I raised 3 children and I have 6 grandchildren, one of whom just a while ago turned 9. He is assigned chores, but they are things like emptying the garbage cans and wiping down the sinks. He does a pretty good job with those things, but I do not think he would do very well folding and putting away clothes. That is something that requires a bit more expertise, and I really think you should look into giving him some chores for which he is presently better equipped. I think you are expecting too much too soon, and I would not punish for not properly folding his clothes. I would give him things to do at which he would be more apt to succeed.

    Answer by NannyB. at 9:14 PM on Mar. 28, 2011

  • NannyB as I clearly stated I dont expect him to do anything perfectly whatsoever. I am simply expecting some EFFORT. Which is plainly not happening. All I expect is effort and all I am getting is attitude.

    Comment by SaturnsMom (original poster) at 9:21 PM on Mar. 28, 2011

  • Gotta disagree with NannyB. An 8 year old is perfectly capable of putting clothes away, and so much more. You need to stop putting effort in crap he wants, and turn it around on him. He wants a snack? Nah, don't feel like it. He wants to watch tv? Nah, don't feel like letting him. He'll get the picture.

    Answer by Pnukey at 7:19 PM on Mar. 30, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.