My husband has a 13 yr old daughter that we got custody of about 4 years ago. She refuses to do chores or help out in any way in our home. Her grades in school are ok for the most part, but she is failing science and math. Any time I bring these things to his attention he doesn't want to do anything about it. He thinks that if he makes her mad she will want to go live with her mom. She agreed to do chores and keep her grades up to be able to join ski club in school. She has not followed through nor will he say anything to her. When I do he says I have to ask her in a sweet tone to do these things every day. I refuse to. That isn't how the world works. I'm at my wits end. He takes her skiing on the weekends and other fun stuff while I stay home with our 9 month old and 2 year old. I don't see how this is fair. Especially since i don't feel she has earned anything. Any ideas on how to open his eyes? I'm very tired of his daughter being put before me! Am I being unreasonable?Answer Question
Asked by Anonymous at 1:22 PM on Mar. 29, 2011 in Teens (13-17)
I don't think your being unreasonable at all. She acts that way because she is allowed to. I agree with you and I'm sorry that I don't have any helpful ideas on how to open up hubbys eyes.
Answer by MrsHouston47302 at 1:24 PM on Mar. 29, 2011
Answer by gemgem at 1:25 PM on Mar. 29, 2011
I am not sure if it would help although there is a book called Get out of my life. It is a great book on how to deal with your teenagers and what they are going through. I also don't think you are being unreasonable, although I do think if he doesn't want to see it then you can't make him.
Answer by cornflakegirl3 at 1:28 PM on Mar. 29, 2011
Explain to him that as her step mom you love her and want whats best for her long term. If she does not get good grades now,her chances of going to college are shot. If she does not learn to take care of chores and learn to cook now,it will be difficult for her when she is on her own. Just be clear that it is her future you are concerned with and I am certain he will come around.
Answer by thecoffeefairy at 1:30 PM on Mar. 29, 2011
Answer by mom2mybabes at 2:09 PM on Mar. 29, 2011
Answer by JLS2388 at 2:51 PM on Mar. 29, 2011
Answer by Anonymous at 2:54 PM on Mar. 29, 2011
Answer by rkoloms at 7:38 PM on Mar. 29, 2011
Answer by 4EqltyMom at 1:02 PM on Mar. 30, 2011
Answer by lucky35 at 3:30 PM on Mar. 31, 2011
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