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SHOULD SHE MARRY HIM?

My niece (22) wants to marry a guy who is in the Marines (22). Well, Reserve. They are putting it off until they can save money. Oh, she doesn't work or go to school. He's in the Reserve. Yeah...I know, but they are sooooo in love (lol). Give me advice where she won't shut me out. She has already shut out her mom.

Answer Question
 
ladylovemm

Asked by ladylovemm at 10:48 PM on Mar. 29, 2011 in Relationships

Level 10 (411 Credits)
Answers (15)
  • ive been with my dh since i was 16 i lived with him since i was 16. 8 years later we are still in love. why do you not want her to marry him is he a bad person? if not i wouldnt try and stop her shes 22 and in love. im a helpless romantic lol by trying to stop her its going to just push her twords it more.
    whitenena

    Answer by whitenena at 10:51 PM on Mar. 29, 2011

  • its her dessicion. You cant make that for her. If she loves him and wants to marry him and you tell her no she will be mad. Let them do there thing, they old enough they know what they doing.
    LittleBirdFly

    Answer by LittleBirdFly at 10:56 PM on Mar. 29, 2011

  • She's an adult. She can marry is she wishes to.
    twinsplus2more

    Answer by twinsplus2more at 10:57 PM on Mar. 29, 2011

  • Judging her will push her into shutting you out, even if you mean well. Perhaps there will be a nice way you can have a conversation with her about: I'm happy for you both, while you're saving money for the wedding are you considering getting a job? going to school? etc. Act (well not act but make sure to portray yourself as) a resource wanting to help her get prepared for her marriage and future.
    LoveBuggsMommie

    Answer by LoveBuggsMommie at 10:58 PM on Mar. 29, 2011

  • yeah she is an adult
    mamawilbur

    Answer by mamawilbur at 10:58 PM on Mar. 29, 2011

  • If you want to give her advice to help her life, don't focus on the wedding thing. At 22, although still young, she's old enough to make her own decisions about that. Instead, focus on trying to get her to go back to college or to get a good job.

    Eek_a_Geek

    Answer by Eek_a_Geek at 11:02 PM on Mar. 29, 2011

  • She's a big girl and she's old enough to make her own decisions even if you think they aren't the right decisions. She's going to do what she wants. Trying to tell her what to do will just push her away. She's going to make mistakes in life and unfortunately there isn't much you can do about it. But what you can do, is be a great aunt who loves her and is there for her no matter what! We all learn by making our own mistakes and she will love and respect you so much more if you let her live her life and support her when others might not and if you're there for her when she really needs you.
    KristyB

    Answer by KristyB at 11:15 PM on Mar. 29, 2011

  • that she decision not urs...
    DeeMarie87

    Answer by DeeMarie87 at 11:21 PM on Mar. 29, 2011

  • Why is it such a bad thing for a marriage between them to happen?
    bdflykisses

    Answer by bdflykisses at 11:28 PM on Mar. 29, 2011

  • My sister had the same problem with her daughter. My sister got so mad that she felt like hitting her in the face. (She didn't though.) She finally backed off and my niece came to her senses. Pushing her away isn't going to help matters. It will only make her want to do it. She's 22 and an adult. You can't keep her from getting married. But sometimes they have to learn from their own mistakes.
    amessageofhope

    Answer by amessageofhope at 12:53 AM on Mar. 30, 2011

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