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I need some advice!! ....midwife or OBGYN?

I want a midwife!!!! Because I want a waterbirth. I went to see one today and she made me feel very comfortable and she explained everything. I think it would be an amazing trade off to what I will be getting if I see an OB. And I'm esp worried about that because she said that most of the OBs around here are horrible when following birthing plans. They don't care what the mother wants and only does what they want. That pisses me off even to hear that. So the only thing is I'm on medicaid and I know it'll pay for everything. A midwife's fee is $3,300. Which is a lot for two college students. But she said she doesn't mind how we pay for it or whatever we can do it however it'll fit with our budget. Well, I was telling my MIL about it and she was like it sounds great and all but money is tight and you and (my fiance) have a lot to think about.....

I get so annoyed hearing that. I know what I want. And I just want some support. My parents are even willing to help. Idk why his parents haven't offered to help with anything at all. This was an unexpected pregnancy so my parents are even willing to help pay for our rent!! Anyways, what direction should I go...midwife or OBGYN? Bc of the money.


Asked by Keeely07 at 7:03 PM on Mar. 30, 2011 in Pregnancy

Level 17 (4,476 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (17)
  • Midwives are a hell of a lot better than OBGYN's hands down. They know just as much as doctors but they actually care about the mother and baby. Doctors dont give a shit about the mother and baby...they care about what happens to them if something goes wrong. Trust me, i know this because my first birth was not exactly happy joy joy because my doctor who delivered was an asshole to me along with all the nurses.

    That's your opinion, which you're entitled to. But it's not fact. I've had the same OB/GYN since I was 14, I'm now 24 about to have my second child. I have NO complaints on my dr. She is absolutely amazing, very professional, always putting patients wants and needs first, and safely delivered my first and is about to do the same for my second. You asked for opinions, people gave them. If OBGYN's are so bad in your opinion, why do you even have a question posted? Because you're not asking at this point, you're bashing.

    Answer by ba13ygrl1987 at 7:20 PM on Mar. 30, 2011

  • It's up to you but you shouldn't expect his family to offer to pay when YOU TWO are the ones that got pregnant. My pregnancy was unplanned and I never expected my parents to pay a dime. I worked and so did the father of my child. Not to sound rude but you sound really spoiled they way you are expecting people to pay for your pregnancy

    Answer by June_Mama09 at 7:08 PM on Mar. 30, 2011

  • 1st of all, if you haven't talked to any OBGYN's in your area you can't really rule them out. Of course the midwife is going to tell you how horrible they are because she wants to lock in your business.

    If it was me i would go with the Obgyn. If you have qualified for medicaid and they are going to pay for all your expenses that is a pretty good reason to go with a normal dr. Especially if funds are so tight that your parents are helping pay your rent! Once you have a baby things just get more and more expensive.


    Answer by bootsky at 7:08 PM on Mar. 30, 2011

  • Go for what you want. Make sure though your payments leave you some $$$ for diapers and clothing and things like that the baby will need. Breastfeed and save some $$$ not having to buy bottles and formula though WIC can help out there.

    Answer by 2autisticsmom at 7:08 PM on Mar. 30, 2011

  • I would go with the midwife even if I had to pay out of pocket.

    Answer by MrsMWF at 7:09 PM on Mar. 30, 2011

  • But I would go with an OBGYN... just find one you like

    Answer by June_Mama09 at 7:09 PM on Mar. 30, 2011

  • I have had two hospital births, one homebirth with a midwife and will be having another hb with midwife in june. It is pricey, costs us about the same and its always finding side jobs to pay for it for us cause its certainly not in the budget. But that is the one great thing about a midwife you two will get to know and like each other and she will work with you on the money. Just find one that you can connect with and you feel comofortable and safe with. I LOVE my midwife shes wonderful and I am so excited about having another homebirth, they don't even compare with being in a hospital imo. Its so much more comfortable and laid back and wonderful with a midwife. Anyway imo its totally worth going with a midwife :)

    Answer by leejoy at 7:10 PM on Mar. 30, 2011

  • But yes of course a midwife is going to tell you an oB sucks. She wants money too. Is she qualified to handle the unexpected things that can pop up?? Like say a uterus that fails to contract down like it is supposed to causing you to lose blood. Some are and some aren't so make sure you read up on her credentials and qualifications.

    Answer by 2autisticsmom at 7:12 PM on Mar. 30, 2011

  • Ok people stop judging what the hell. You have no idea what my situation is except for that small piece. I'm asking ONE thing. Don't judge me. I am NOT spoiled by any means. My parents help me because they love me and I am a full time student with a 2.5 year old and they do not want me having a job on top of everything. I'm not EXPECTING them to help. Geez....i shouldn't have put that in the question thats not even what this is about.

    Comment by Keeely07 (original poster) at 7:12 PM on Mar. 30, 2011

  • I had the best of both worlds because my midwife and ob shared an office. I was able to see them both for different things.

    Answer by JulieJacobKyle at 7:13 PM on Mar. 30, 2011