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I was just told I push my DS to hard??? WHAT!?

I think this is a load of crap! A "friend" of mine says that because my 22 month old is going potty twice a day on his own potty, I'm pushing him to hard. She says I have always pushed him because he was talking in sentences at 8 months old and that that is just not natural. That kids just don't talk like that at 8 months. Ok well I have never "pushed" him. At 8 months he was saying "what's that" because I would ask him that all the time. i told her that i don't push him I just talk to him and exsplain things. She said what about his ABC's and the counting everything for him. I told her was just trying to teach him. I don't expect him to remember everything. Being repetative will help him learn things easier later on. She has a child who is 6 months older and does the samething my kid does. I asked her if that means she pushes her daughter. She said no because her daughter picks things up from Dora and Sesame Street. She doesn't have to force her to learn things. What???

I swear I don't force him to do anything. In fact if I start counting or singing (any song) and he doesn't want me to he says "Stop, no please(peas)."

Am I bad mother cuse my son picks up on things? It's always been easy for him. Why is it I'm pushing cuse I don't sit my child in front of the TV and expect it to teach him?

Am I pushing him??


Asked by Liamsmom09 at 9:44 AM on Mar. 31, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 19 (7,487 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (15)
  • My child is by no means boy wonder or even a genius , but he has a tendency to be a little ahead of the curve on some simple showy things. As a parent I have learned by being hit with a wet noodle to shut up about any way my child is advanced amongst the moms of his peers. One example of this was when I got lambasted when we started pointing out different letters he found on the party napkins just before he hit two at a friend's childs birthday party and I honestly and truly was annoyed that he kept missing the letter M when he sang the alphabet because it turns out the 3 year old did not even know part of the alphabet or have any letter recognition and neither did any of her friends. I have learned that my son's advancements should be privy to family fight club only, and you know the first rule of fight club. The same woman who will laugh with you about poop will turn evil if she thinks your kid is one step ahead.

    Answer by hotelmom123 at 12:49 PM on Mar. 31, 2011

  • She is feeling guilty because she does not give her child the one on one attention you are giving yours.

    Answer by tootoobusy at 9:46 AM on Mar. 31, 2011

  • LOL well if you are a bad mom then so am I. My kids never got to watch much TV when they were babies. I always talked to them and would sing the ABC song with them and all of that. I do alot of talking with my kids from the time they are babies and on. I dont spank I have said this time & again so I do think some of my ability to talk to the kids when they are bad and have them LISTEN also comes from the fact I have always talked to them. Talking to them and having them pick things up and understand to me is important. That is how they are going to learn in school as well.

    Answer by gemgem at 9:47 AM on Mar. 31, 2011

  • You seem to be following his lead. That's great!

    Answer by JSD24 at 9:54 AM on Mar. 31, 2011

  • Cudos to you Mom for being an active parent. Too many people, like your friend, expect the tv to do all the teaching for them. She's probably just insecure because your DS is younger than her child but at the same Developmental Level. The reality that other children may be smarter, or quicker to learn than your own child can be hard to swallow sometimes. Keep doing what your doing and tell her to keep her opinions about it to herself in the future.

    Answer by Kimedbs at 9:55 AM on Mar. 31, 2011

  • Just because your child(ren) do things early doesn't necessarily mean they are "pushed".  If they are "pushed" and accomplish the task what's the problem.  There are a lot of things out there they aren't going to "want" to do but they are going to have to do it anyways. 


    Answer by MrsHouston47302 at 9:46 AM on Mar. 31, 2011

  • I don't really have enough information to determine if you're pushing him or not, but it doesn't sound like you are. It sounds like she may be looking for justifications regarding the development of her own child, relative to yours. Maybe she's trying strategies to avoid feeling guilty.

    Answer by Dr.Donna at 9:47 AM on Mar. 31, 2011

  • WTF ur "friend" needs to get a clue!!!!!! and that is awesome that he is learning so well, that doesnt mean you push.. it means you CARE and TAKE YOUR TIME with him!!!

    Answer by kylansmommy09 at 9:48 AM on Mar. 31, 2011

  • You are doing great and sounds like you got a smart lil' cookie on your hands. Be proud... Opinions are like a$$ holes everyone has one. Don't worry...

    Answer by Elysium927 at 10:15 AM on Mar. 31, 2011

  • My son didn't talk at 8 mons but he would crawl w/flash cards in his hand and give them to us. He wanted to sit on our laps and turn the cards while we said the letter or number or animal that was on the card. I had family members asking why we were doing this...I told them point blank, he wants us to do it w/him, we don't force him.
    Just keep doing what you;re doing. My kids, too, learned things from my husband and me, not from TV. Well, at least not all they learned were from TV!

    Answer by JenE1098 at 11:52 AM on Mar. 31, 2011