My daughter is 12, she will be 13 years old in July. She is constantly sneaking & applying eyeliner. I think she is too young...but its been a big ole fight for the past six months. She does well in school and helps out around the house, she does have tons of tude...what are your thoughts....too young or let it fly (just curious)??
Answer by knicole0708 at 3:54 PM on Mar. 31, 2011
The issue isn't the eyeliner but she is sneaking something you have previously said no to. And that you are concerned she looks much older. Sometimes looking older can't be helped. It isn't a matter of dress or makeup for some kids - they are just taller, have more development at their age, and act a little older or more mature. It is hard sometimes for those kids because then people treat them as being older than what they really are. If this were my situation I would have a talk with her about my expectations for how she is to look and that I am willing to be flexible - to a degree. But what I will not tolerate is deliberately doing something I said NO to. I recognize I can be wrong or unfair but it doesn't give you the right to disregard my parenting. There are better ways for you to communicate to me you are ready to wear eyeliner, go to dances, go to the mall with friends, drive a car, ect...
Answer by frogdawg at 10:15 AM on Apr. 1, 2011
The battle here is not the eyeliner. The bigger picture is she is not respectful of how to communicate her thoughts about what is fair. I see it as a teachable moment. To talk openly about what a child her age, in your opinion should be wearing, not wearing, doing or not doing. And for her to give her opinions. Then to reach an agreement. You can say I see your point and this is what I can do as a parent. But my point as a parent is you have privileges. Having an attitude with me, talking back, not doing expected chores, ect...means consequences. It shows you are not ready for some of the privileges you currently have or would like to have. I would personally set my rules about how she can wear her makeup (including eyeliner), where she can wear it, and other things as well. I would talk to her about I want her opinions in a respectful way. She can loose any privledge when I have no respect or honesty.
Answer by frogdawg at 10:23 AM on Apr. 1, 2011
Answer by feralkitten at 3:51 PM on Mar. 31, 2011
Answer by thecoffeefairy at 4:01 PM on Mar. 31, 2011
Answer by MommaKath1975 at 7:38 AM on Apr. 1, 2011
Answer by cfh72 at 11:48 PM on Apr. 2, 2011
Answer by carellidkag at 9:39 AM on Apr. 4, 2011