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2 Bumps

Wife+WorkingMom+Student=UnHappy :(

My poor sister, she works, goes to school, and handles her son by herself. (so it seems) my bil doesn't really help unless its to complain about the house not being picked up or wanting to take care of my nephew. She has so much on her mind. I feel bad for her. She is debating on dropping school. ( she wants to be a nurse and has been in school for 3 yrs trying to accomplish this one or 2 classes at a time) She's been having a hard time studing and wants to just flunk out so she can take it again.( this would be the 2nd time she has done this with a class) She's beating herself up about doing this. She's taking physiology and microbiology.
My question is what advice should i give her? I think she should keep trying, but she feels that she shouldn't be taking them more then once, and feels really bad about it.

Would you keep taking a class as many times needed to pass or just flunk out??


Asked by Anonymous at 4:54 PM on Mar. 31, 2011 in

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • Please tell her not to give up, no matter what. I know it gets hard and stressful. I work at a physically demanding job, also go to school, raise my kids and am in constant pain and just about exhausted every day. I have contemplated quitting school, even quitting my job, I realize, when times are just too much. And trust me, it is a strong emotion to have these thoughts going through your mind; it's exasperating. But I just think to myself, why I am doing this all and remind myself that I want a better life for my kids and also to enhance my abilities to better my chances in succeeding as far as I allow myself. Yes it is a challenge, but it makes me stronger, even when I feel my weakest. Just let her know that you are proud of her and how better she will feel when she gets through this. Best wishes to her and her family and you for caring so much, enough to seek help and advice.

    Answer by mommieGem at 3:20 AM on Apr. 1, 2011

  • I was a single mom & full time college student, so I feel her pain! If she takes a break, she may not get back into it. Maybe you could offer to watch your niece/nephew so she can study. Sometimes having that support system helps keep you going. Of course it'd be nice if she had the same support from her husb. Can you find a big guy to kick him in the butt & knock some sense into him? -lol Other suggestions would be to fix her family a meal once a week or help her w/ some laundry- while you're babysitting! :) GL

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 4:59 PM on Mar. 31, 2011

  • I'd try to do the best I could the first time. It's hard. Definitely harder if you have an SO that's not supportive or help out. Are you able to help her any? Maybe go over and help out with your nephew while she studies? Keep telling her right now it's hard, but once she graduates and becomes a nurse, all that hard work and time will be worth it. Her son will respect her when he's grown for doing her best to give herself and him a better life. Good luck to your sister!

    Answer by IrishPennMom at 4:59 PM on Mar. 31, 2011

  • Retaking classes is just going to drag out the process even longer. She needs to discuss this with her husband and let him know what he can do to help her get through this to make the situation better for all of them. He needs to be reminded that they are a team, and it takes a team effort to get ahead.

    Answer by TweenAndTwinMom at 5:09 PM on Mar. 31, 2011

  • She should stay--sounds like she has wonderful support system of you and mom! I have been there and I couldnot agree more on how hard--2 boys!!

    Answer by PrincessStacy at 9:57 PM on Mar. 31, 2011

  • She needs to sit down and talk to her DH. She needs to let him know where she is at and how she feels. Then if he doesn't grow up and pitch in, she might want to consider some time away. He is taking her for granted and she's allowing it. She needs to stand up for herself or she is going to get lost. Or she could consider quitting her job, see what her DH feels about that. Also, you might be able to help a little bit. Try making a meal for on a day that she has class or come over and help her pick up. I don't want this to seem like I am laying anything on you, but it might make her feel better if she had some help from her family who loves her. BTW- It might be that your BIL resents her going to school. Maybe he feels that school is taking away from the time she could be at home and has decided that he will make it more difficult for her. Tell her good luck.


    Answer by krissyvelazquez at 5:01 PM on Mar. 31, 2011

  • My mom and I do go to her house and clean it like once or twice a week.. Her mil lives next door and is always taking them food or my bil gets fast food. But the thing is she feels that she is a loser cause she has to take a class more then once. I've told her that its hard for her to focus because she has everything on her mind.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 5:09 PM on Mar. 31, 2011

  • I think hubby should help too. But she's reallly beating herself up about haveing to retake the classes. She says she feels like a loser and feels that she should get it right the first time! I keep trying to encourge her and to get her to get hubby to help. idk....

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 5:18 PM on Mar. 31, 2011

  • I would continue to take the class now.

    Answer by Caitlin10081989 at 2:32 AM on Apr. 1, 2011

  • Flunk.


    Answer by MoreMia at 12:16 PM on Apr. 1, 2011