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Sister pregnant

I just found out Monday my 19 year old sister is pregnant by her 39 year old BF. He is a total looser, never had a job, has a record a mile long, never finished school, Im so disappointed in this. We were not raised this way, not saying were better than him, but my sister could do so much better. In the past I was on her about leaving him, but since she is preggo I have stopped, but he has went out of town to "work" for a few months and I want her to leave. Should I push it or let her live her own life.

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greenbeanmoma

Asked by greenbeanmoma at 10:15 PM on Mar. 31, 2011 in Pregnancy

Level 12 (756 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • It sounds like she is old enough to make her own decisions, but you also have a place as her sister to let her know you're worried. Just tell her what you've posted "I love you, and I'm concerned for you and the baby that being with him will not be what's best for you. You both deserve better. If not for me, think of how depending on him will make it harder to take care of you child." Then back off, but stay close by to jump in when she needs a helping hand.
    EdwinsMommy

    Answer by EdwinsMommy at 10:19 PM on Mar. 31, 2011

  • she would ignore you and tell you to mind her own business.. she unfortunatly will find out on her own when the time comes :(
    3HappylKidds

    Answer by 3HappylKidds at 10:19 PM on Mar. 31, 2011

  • let her know where you stand, that you love her very mich, and respect her dicissons. i bet, once she has this baby, somthing in her head will click and she will want the best for her and her baby, she will do whats right. make sure she knows you are alwyas there for her and you wont say "i told ya so" keep in touch with her and let her know she can always talk to you and your there for her if she needs help.
    dfwhite

    Answer by dfwhite at 10:19 PM on Mar. 31, 2011

  • First you are better than he is, he is a loser don't be afraid to said that.

    Tell your sister that you hope he will be able to give her a home,support her like she deserves.

    I think he left her and hope he does not come back!

    Don't push her out, tell her now she has to think about what kind of live she wants for her chid.

    If she goes that will be her choosing.

    gammie

    Answer by gammie at 10:25 PM on Mar. 31, 2011

  • How wonderful she has a sister that cares about her and loves her so much. My sisters would all do the same for me and that is very comforting to know. I am sure she knows it too. However, she does have to live her own life, the only thing you can do is be there for her when SHE is ready to leave. I am sure she will realize it if he does not skip out on her. And know she has you to fall back on will be of great comfort for her. Good luck to you and to her, I hope this gets resolved quickly and I hope she has a stress free pregnancy.
    Peajewel

    Answer by Peajewel at 10:39 PM on Mar. 31, 2011

  • You can't convince her. THe more you push, the more likely you are to push her away, and then she won't come to you when she really is in need. I would say the best thing to do is be supportive, let her know you're there for her no matter what (she already thinks you should leave him). And if/when the loser lets her down and she learns the lesson on her own, she'll run to you for comfort.
    Adelicious

    Answer by Adelicious at 11:34 PM on Mar. 31, 2011

  • Just to add, if you talk bad about him or tell her to leave him, she'll feel like she needs to defend him, when she might really need to confide in you about what a loser he is.
    Adelicious

    Answer by Adelicious at 11:35 PM on Mar. 31, 2011

  • Support her F the dude she needs you
    christinahenry

    Answer by christinahenry at 12:38 AM on Apr. 1, 2011

  • even though he obviously is less to be desired and she is an adult legally she is only 19...and she will probably do the exact opposite if not because its what she wants but just to spite you and everyone else...the best thing to do is while he is gone talk to your sister about all the things a baby needs and requires and ask your sister if he is the man that can provide that...if she is scared about having the baby on her own let her know you will be there no matter what and then back off and let her make her own choices on it because in the end she will get tired of hearing it and resent you for it and it will take away from the joy of her being pregnant and you dont want to ruin the experience for her trust me its something she will think about forever and who knows maybe he will show her how bad he is and leave her while shes pregnant..not that i want that for her but it would show her what kind of person he really is
    ahsot1230

    Answer by ahsot1230 at 2:39 AM on Apr. 1, 2011

  • It's her life let her live it. He might turn his life around he might not but like the saying goes "you've made your bed now lye in it" She created this situation for herself leave her be, that's unless you're gonna take the roll of baby daddy.
    prissysayshi

    Answer by prissysayshi at 3:22 AM on Apr. 1, 2011

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