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What to do when my husband is deployed?

besides going to school and playing with my 1 year olds toys i feel like i am going to become a hermit...i really dont know what i am going to do or how i am going to deal with the onlyness.....does any one hae any ideas that help them

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Asked by miaB.20 at 3:44 AM on Apr. 1, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 4 (47 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • I started a home business making jewelry and I love it! I get out of the house by selling at festivals. I throw jewelry parties. You could do the same things with any homemade item. Also, find a friend with a kid around your child's age and find a nice place to put the kids on their strollers and take a walk like a park or a downtown area. My biggest advice is to find a hobby! With making jewelry, even if I'm not making a huge profit I usually make enough to restock on supplies so I can continue doing something I enjoy. Volunteer work is something to look into. I've volunteered for a place that houses pregnant teens. I just spend time with them, take them to a movie or out to eat, take them to doctors appointments and run errands for them and I get to bring my 1 year old son with me.

    Answer by Court128 at 4:01 AM on Apr. 1, 2011

  • Hobbies are a big thing to keep yourself busy. Go out exploring wherever you're at and just make time to see the sights...if there are any. Start a home business. Scentsy and MaryKay seem to be some of the ones I've seen most of. Make friends. If there's an online group in your area...set up playdates or Mommy's day out sort of things so you don't just spend time indoors. Take walks and be creative. There are many things you can do while he's away. Anything can pass the time really and he'll be back before you know it. Hang in there!

    Answer by Imortlmommy at 4:21 AM on Apr. 1, 2011

  • yeah we hae both been through alot this last year and it is my first deployment with him..... last time he was deployed boi-tah-ana happend i dont know how to spell it but it is hard not to worry about him.... thanks girls for the ideas i am going to have to break out of my shell i get really nerous around other woman becouse i am so young (19)

    Comment by miaB.20 (original poster) at 4:31 AM on Apr. 1, 2011

  • ell hunnie, with the deplyment money that youet youcan afford to take you chil to different places! Take rveto te beach, go tomuseaus, zoos, and other fun acivitis, have 5 kids between and 4 monthes old, ad we go do TONS of stuff when DH is deployed!

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:11 AM on Apr. 1, 2011

  • I don't know if you've seen it here or not, but there's a great board on here called Military Moms. There's a LOT of great info and support on there and it has people from all branches - women whose dh is military, who are military themselves, whose kids are in the military, and any combo of the above.

    I can also tell you (as someone who has spent 20 yrs with the military in one way or another and has been married for 18 yrs and seen a lot of deployments and separations) - you need to STAY BUSY! Join a playgroup, go to your Spouse Meetings (some are drama filled, some are really good, and some have some drama queens and some really nice people, you just have to get to know them). Take a class, go to the gym, all sorts of stuff. Contact your Fleet and Family Center (or your branch equivalent) and see if they have activities for families of deployed.


    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 6:39 AM on Apr. 1, 2011

  • cont

    Volunteer somewhere, even if you have to hire a sitter, or trade off child care with another mom. Trust me - I know you say you're nervous because you're young, but trust me on this - there are a LOT more "young" military wives than there are "old" ones (think about it - how many more younger military people do you see walking around than the old guys?) Also, the old ones like me didn't start out this age - we were young wives at one time ourselves, and there are a lot of us around who are more than willing to be there as a support system to the current younger (new at this) wives - because we remember what it's like and what you're going though (and are still going through some of it ourselves).


    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 6:43 AM on Apr. 1, 2011

  • cont

    But please, whatever you do, don't let yourself fall into the trap of isolating yourself and or sitting there, waiting for the phone to ring, an email to come through, him to get on chat, etc. It's not going to make him come home any sooner, or the phone to ring, or an email to come through, etc. It's just going to end up making you (and him) miserable, a bit crazy, and possibly divorced. I'm NOT saying go out drinking every weekend, dancing on tables, etc. But going out to dinner with some of the other wives, or having a movie night where you all hang out at one of your houses, taking a class, etc - will make it MUCH easier to survive it!

    Good luck! Check out that message board, and if you want, feel free to send me an email :-)

    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 6:46 AM on Apr. 1, 2011

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