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3 Bumps

How do Catholics feel about this?

I'm a Catholic who is getting married to a wayward Catholic who has found his way back into the church. He has an out of wedlock child from right out of high school. As a devout Catholic I am ashamed of the situation. I tried to talk to my priest, but he couldn't tell me not to be ashamed of my fiance's past - only that 19 year old boys make mistakes. Does anyone have any advice to help me with my conflicting feelings?

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Asked by Anonymous at 11:05 PM on Apr. 1, 2011 in Religion & Beliefs

Answers (21)
  • don't're not perfect.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:09 PM on Apr. 1, 2011

  • You've consulted your Priest, a man 'of god', if he says he understands then there's nothing to worry about. You're marrying your fiancĂ©e for a reason: you love him for what he is now, not what he has done in the past.

    Answer by EdwinsMommy at 11:14 PM on Apr. 1, 2011

  • the past is the past. you should never be ashamed of the man that you love, not for something like that, now if he refused to take responsibility for that child then i'd be embarrassed. I understand why your asking for opinions but if God can forgive him and love him no matter what his situation then you can do the same. Please dont worry about what other people think either, it's not their business.

    Answer by gummybearmomma at 11:19 PM on Apr. 1, 2011

  • If he has asked for forgiveness from God and paid his penitence as is custom in the Catholic faith then he is back in God's favor and should be in your as well. He can't change the past, he can only do what he can to make things right. Everyone makes mistakes and everyone receives forgiveness from the Lord when they ask for it. If The Lord can forgive him why can't you? Think about it.

    Answer by But_Mommie at 11:21 PM on Apr. 1, 2011

  • How do you find the strength not to worry about what others think?

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:23 PM on Apr. 1, 2011

  • Pray for strength and guidance. I just dont really care what others think because i cant live my life wondering what he or she will think, If I did that, I would be miserable. Just pray for the strength and He will give it to you.

    Answer by gummybearmomma at 11:27 PM on Apr. 1, 2011

  • If others are outwardly acting as though this is a problem they need to rethink *their* faith. God wants us to forgive. If they can't forgive that is not *your* problem. It is *their* problem. You should feel sorry for them and pray that they will one day learn to understand/follow their proclaimed Gods teachings.

    Answer by But_Mommie at 11:29 PM on Apr. 1, 2011

  • what others think...
    1. WHO CARES what others think. Everyone has an opinion & its not always a nice one.
    2. I know a guy that has 4 (FOUR) kids by 4 different woman.. and I know a few good moms out there that have multiple kids by different dads. It happens... and its very common now days.

    Answer by MommaTasha1003 at 11:41 PM on Apr. 1, 2011

  • How do you find the strength not to worry about what others think?

    If what others think is at the root of this, then I would seriously consider not marrying him until you can accept him for him- and until you can decide that who he is to you is more important than what others think-
    It is not fair to either of you to go any further until you can put him first and not worry about what others think of something that happened years ago-
    I was not trying to sound harsh-

    Answer by soyousay at 11:50 PM on Apr. 1, 2011

  • Wow. A monsignor married us, I was pregnant and we had been living together. We realized that what we were doing was not right in the eyes of the church, but the monsignor welcomed us with open arms and supported us every step of the way. I was married when I was 7 months pregnant, in the church, and no one ever judged me (at least openly). I think you need to take a step back, and ask yourself the real reasons why you frown upon this. If a monsignor of the Church can see past my situation, I believe you should be able to look past this and not worry about what other people think (most likely the majority of people couldn't care less).

    Answer by anime_mom619 at 11:55 PM on Apr. 1, 2011

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