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3 Bumps

FMIL from hell

My fiance moved his mom and brother in when his parents got a divorce and since things have been so hectic. I have a 4 year old son that I have from a previous relationship. His dad walked out and left me when my son was months old and I raised him on my on. I'm now 5 months pregnant and since the day I found out I was pregnant my FMIL has been trying to make my life a living hell. When she moved in my fiance being the loving son he is decided to give her the master bedroom (she'd have it no other way) and his brother their own room. We took the smaller room and gave my son the other room (4 bedroom house). When we found out we we're expecting we asked his mom if she's mind switching room with us so we weould have enough room from the baby's things. She said only if the two of us and the two kids shared the one room and she got two bedroom. Ridiculous, yes. Things escalated like this day after day. Everytime I pass her she calls me (very loudly might I add) a hoe or a bitch. She says things like "sleeping around having babies by different men and just all kinds of nasty things infront of my son. She decided to move out for about 4 months yet comes and goes randomly because we never changed the locks. After leaving she realized she cant afford it and came by today to tell us shes moving back in and theres nothing we can do about it and shes going to make our lives a living hell. I dont want her to and he says he doesnt either, but idk what we can do to stop her besides change the locks which isnt much.

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Asked by Anonymous at 11:42 PM on Apr. 1, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (16)
  • UM it is yalls house and he can have a restraining order put on her where she cant come on the property. I sure as hell wouldnt let her back in my house.

    Answer by ready4baby2011 at 11:49 PM on Apr. 1, 2011

  • Tell your SO to put his foot down! Of course you can stop her- if need be you can call the police to help. Change the locks, put on an additional deadbolt, whatever you have to do. But your SO should be handling her! Good luck! I hope she doesn't come back- she sounds AWFUL.

    Answer by lovingmy4babies at 11:51 PM on Apr. 1, 2011

  • You can stop her. She may be his mother but shes more than capable of taking care of her self (i am assuming..and i may assume wrong). If she is going to live with you..then your fiancĂ©e and you need to put up some boundaries and if she doesn't respect them then theres the curb. If you really dont..she cant force you to. Its YOUR house. Change the locks and tell her you gave her a chance before and all she did was show you that shes rude and disrespectful and yall dont want her at your house..then proceed to help her find somewhere else to live. good luck

    Answer by SweetPoison at 11:54 PM on Apr. 1, 2011

  • moving back in and nothing you can do about it?
    are you living in her house? if not, then find out what you can legally do about it, and do it!

    Answer by ItsMe89 at 11:59 PM on Apr. 1, 2011

  • I know how you feel when it comes to the part about the children. I am in the same situation where my son has a different father and my fiance and I have one on the way and his mother looks down on me because of it. He needs to tell her to stop! For some reason my fiance would just let whatever his mom said blow over and after a while of me getting really upset over it he started to realize she was being immature, judegmental and hypocritical and started defending me. We had to live in her house for a bit and it was hell! We couldn't say much back but now that we are in our own place he said if she ever were to disrespect me in my house he would tell her to leave, and your fiance needs to do the same. It's not healthy or fair for you or your son to deal with her. I would put my foot down and call the police if she came back an dif your fiance truly loves you and your child he will understand and support you. Good luck!

    Answer by kayaiden8907 at 12:15 AM on Apr. 2, 2011


    Answer by shortycmlb at 12:20 AM on Apr. 2, 2011

  • If he's not willing to put his foot down, I wouldn't marry him. She will only ruin your marriage because your Fiance won't step up. If he steps up, then she won't be moving in. Problem solved.

    Answer by corbysmom531 at 12:20 AM on Apr. 2, 2011

  • Corbysmom hit the mark here.

    Your fiance needs to tell her that she is not welcome as long as she continues to be so disrespectful to the woman he has chosen to marry. By not addressing his mother, he is enabling her behavior. If he gives her the authority to continue this behavior it will never stop and actually the marriage will only turn it up. It will not get better with marriage. You need to sort this out before you marry this man or you are going to be miserable. And your fiance really needs to tell her that this name calling and bad behavior will just not be tolerated.

    I hope he can do it for your sake!!!

    Answer by spottedpony at 12:39 AM on Apr. 2, 2011

  • What was she thinking by saying that you can't do anything about it? She's an adult. Is your fiance's brother still living with you? If he is, he should move in with her and help her with the bills. It's your house and you do have a say in who is living there. What does your fiance have to say about it? You're going to have enough going on in your house when the new baby is born. You don't need your FMIL to be there since she is so disrespectful towards you. She seems to forget who put the roof over her head for a while.Who in the H**l does she think she is?

    Answer by amessageofhope at 12:55 AM on Apr. 2, 2011

  • Wow, I'm still in shock that you ASKED her if she would switch rooms in YOUR house and she said what she did. Anyway, change the locks, call the police, invite your future FIL over for the days that you expect MIL (I'm assuming that they didn't have a friendly divorce and she won't want to be around him), move and don't tell her. Okay, the last was a joke, lol, but seriously, it's your house. Don't let her come in and take over.

    Answer by kasey22 at 3:39 AM on Apr. 2, 2011

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