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whats his deal?

I am so sick of my husband. I will ask him to take out the trash or pick something up and he said he will do it later and it NEVER gets done unless i do it. he is constantly puttin my down and then when i tell him it makes me mad he says he was just kidding. its to the point that i am on anti anxiety medicine. and he never helps me out with the baby. you would figure since he doesnt have a job he would help out a little bit at least. im exhausted all the time and he doesnt seem to care. i feel unloved and dont know what to do.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:56 AM on Nov. 29, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (3)
  • Give him an ultimatum...tell him, look buster...I need some help..get off your lazy ass and get a job and help with your kid.
    If he doesn't, explain to him it's easier to take care of yourself and your baby than it is taking care of the three of you...life is too hard to deal with such BS and no man should have to be supported. He needs to step up and be a husband, a father, and a man.

    Hope that doesn't piss you off...I'm not bashing on you...but on him.
    Jill42721

    Answer by Jill42721 at 4:57 AM on Nov. 29, 2008

  • I agree with jill. he feels low and usless & not trying to fix the situation, which by the way IS his job. your doing everything your suppost to do. Id shock him. hes not listening, your complaintes are falling on deaf ears as being a nag, so stop complaining & nagging. just dont say anything at all. one day pick up the baby, go to a friends house for a couple days. someone he cant do a drive by to find you..let him wonder what happened to you. the trick is NO communication for a couple of days. Let him get mad, then zing him with a one liner..."well, maybe you'd better think about this...i CAN make this perminate...you decide". Good Luck
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:53 AM on Nov. 29, 2008

  • Yes, he may be feeling useless and insecure. I can't figure out why he would say he'd do things and then not do them. Perhaps you could put it to him not that he doesn't have a job and so should help, but that you are feeling exhausted and could really use a hand with some of the chores. Make him feel needed and appreciated. Perhaps you two could sit at the kitchen table one quiet evening and talk about making a list of things you both should be in charge of, ask him if this seems a good idea to him. If he agrees then list trash, shopping, etc. on his list, and dishes, cooking, etc. on yours. Ask him again if he thinks it is fair. Build him up instead of the other way. Make him feel that he is necessary to the household.
    Bmat

    Answer by Bmat at 10:22 AM on Nov. 29, 2008

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