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2 Bumps

I think its time

hi ladies ok i think it is time i say something to my sons wife my son is in afgan and his wife is here and she is cheating on him and when she comes for me to see my grandson she is always texting in front of me and smiling like get over it i think i have kept quiet for long enought i mean she let my grandson fall out of the car and bust his head open i will not say anything to my son while he is over there but when he comes home i will spill the beans i think it is only right he knows she is not gonna keep hurting my son he is fighting for her freedom and i know some people tell me i should keep out of it but when she is taking his money and riding them guys around in my sons car and they are around his baby and he will send her money then she will not talk with him any more until she runs out of money and it is really hurting me inside to know that i know and i ant saying anything to her i just wann a blow up so bad it is getting harder for me to keep quiet so i must ask what should i do i just dont want to see my son hurt cause it hurts me

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:12 PM on Apr. 2, 2011 in Adult Children (18+)

Answers (3)
  • That is terrible. She should not be acting that way. Your son and grand baby need you to be the grownup here. Take a step back from being angry and ask yourself: what is your main goal? You want your son to be calm and rational in Afghanistan. You want the baby to be happy and safe. So babysit as much as she will let you and keep your mouth shut until your son gets back. And when he gets back, you keep keeping your mouth shut, because what good will it do to tell? He files for divorce and she gets custody? Some people are just a mess when their spouse is away and handle it badly. Let them work it out themselves. You just worry about spoiling that grand baby.
    Dawn C.

    Answer by Dawn C. at 10:24 PM on Apr. 2, 2011

  • It is a shame you are having to witness this. You are right your son does not need to hear this while he is overseas..but I am sure he knows something is not right in his home...Please remember that if you tell him and they work things out you will be the bad guy when you only wanted to protect him and your grand child....try to hold back in saying anything..if he comes to you and asks that is a different story..I have been through this same thing..glad I held my tongue in my situation...I never sad a bad thing about the woman..he found within a few days of being back on USA soil...what she was all about...she will leave her phone around and he will look through it and see what has been going on...good luck...thank you for his service...
    knowitall-not

    Answer by knowitall-not at 10:28 PM on Apr. 2, 2011

  • Talk to her and only to her. My son was deployed and there is NO NEED to stress your son out. Talk to her and tell her that when he gets home she needs to get them BOTH in to therapy so that he has an outlet when she sees him. There's already the recipe for PTSD just when he gets back all on it's own...add to that her telling him the marriage is over and that's a recipe for even more damage. This is something that needs to be handled VERY delicately.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:51 AM on Apr. 3, 2011

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