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Parent relations

I'm trying to understand how a father should behave with his children,should they play with their kids,spend one on one time,shouldn't they say positive things to lift their self esteem. Well what if the father of your children did none of these things with repeated attempts to help him understand how much the kids need that nurturing? What if one day they grow up and treat their own children exactly like they were treated,would you blame yourself,or would you encourage your children to love their own children the way you loved and nurtured them and to not worry about how their father treated them? Would you have left if he wasn't going to be a good family man?

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MarGeee

Asked by MarGeee at 10:28 PM on Apr. 2, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 20 (9,059 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • I don't know. My dad wasn't the nurturing kind, my mom was. My dad didn't have any sons and he was upset about it, and my 2 sisters knew he wanted a son. He didn't do the one on one time, he said positive things sometimes but he DID NOT cut us down. I don't feel like I have low self esteem and I am a good mom and I married a good man. My dad makes a better grandfather than he did a dad and he knows it. I think the stress of being "the one" is off his shoulders so, he can ease up a bit. I am very nurturing and so is my husband we are always telling our kids they are doing good and tell them they look nice and my parents tell them that also. Sometimes, you just have to look a things and realize that was the hand you were dealt you can either like it or dislike it. I love my Dad and I don't wish anything different about my life. Hope this makes sense. :)
    matthewscandi

    Answer by matthewscandi at 10:51 PM on Apr. 2, 2011

  • My ex didnt do shit but play video games on the weekends while I CUT THE GRASS, ( he bought me my own weedeater) and during the week when he wasnt TOOOOOO busy lying about working over time..... he was on the computer playing poker or chit chatting with ... anyways..... Basically he did nothing with the children but some how put on some B/S act for father of the YEAR for the judge
    kkbird

    Answer by kkbird at 10:51 PM on Apr. 2, 2011

  • just let him be him i was the same way but my husband just sorta started acting interested he had to get used to the fact that there was someone who looked up tp him
    nicolia

    Answer by nicolia at 11:19 PM on Apr. 2, 2011

  • In my experience, with time, it only gets worse. I'm not necessarily talking about the father getting worse, but your relationship. Unless you do something, your resentment will grow. And that isn't good for the kids either. Have you considered counseling?
    4EqltyMom

    Answer by 4EqltyMom at 11:26 PM on Apr. 2, 2011

  • men do what they were taught, my husbands dad stayed busy working on trucks or watching TV and now my husband watches TV or does his own thing it just does not occur to him to interact with kids and also like his dad never ever yelled or hit him he feels there is no reason for raising voices and we both agree on the not hitting thing...but if his dad was a hitter well it would have taught my husband to be a hitter. men follow their dad's just as girls end up following their mom's
    togo90210

    Answer by togo90210 at 12:30 AM on Apr. 3, 2011

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