He is in school FT 4 days a week and works PT in the evenings 3 days a week. He gets home from school a good 3 hours before I get home from work, so I'll ask him to do something simple to help around the house. Like put a load of dishes in the dishwasher. But 9 times out of 10, I get home and he has done NOTHING. So I remind him he said he'd do X or Y. He says he will. So I wait another day. Get home from work. The dishes are still in the sink. Or trash is trying to overflow. GROSS.
Not trying to be mean, but he grew up in poverty and good housekeeping was not a priority in his home.
I either wind up waiting for days for a simple task to get done or doing it myself, which makes me feel pretty damn used/angry and just reinforces to him that if he doesn't do what I ask, I'll just do it myself and he's off the hook. He does do some housework on occasion, but the occasions are few and far between, and then he'll use that example as an excuse ("What do you mean I don't do housework? I just washed dishes 2 weeks ago!").
Just today I had a big talk with him about him needing to step it up and act like a partner rather than my teenaged child, and not leave all the responsibilities on me. I told him if things didn't improve I could not stay with him. (Yes, really, it's that bad to get home from working on my feet all day, know my partner has been home for hours, and watch him sit on the couch while I try to tackle the mess of a house.)
If that doesn't work, WTF do I do? In all other respects he is a wonderful father and my best friend. He just only cleans when the mood strikes him, and it only strikes a couple times a month, for a few minutes at a time, apparently.
Asked by Anonymous at 2:49 AM on Apr. 3, 2011 in Relationships
Answer by GomezMami2908 at 2:58 AM on Apr. 3, 2011
Answer by gabby06 at 3:55 AM on Apr. 3, 2011
Answer by anayasmommy21 at 4:08 AM on Apr. 3, 2011
Answer by Sexyfox09 at 5:13 AM on Apr. 3, 2011
Answer by Sexyfox09 at 5:20 AM on Apr. 3, 2011
Answer by Fistandantalus at 9:34 AM on Apr. 3, 2011
Answer by amberpowell at 10:34 AM on Apr. 3, 2011
I could gripe constantly and then...nothing! I dont get any help PLUS! He thinks that I should wait on him hand and foot....so girl...once you kno....tell me! lol!
Answer by raeyliNlilysmom at 1:51 AM on Apr. 4, 2011
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