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My good friend want to have an abortion! What should I do?

Ok so I am pregnant and a few weeks after I found out I was my friend found out she was too. At first she was really excited it would be her 2nd. But the father wont return calls and treats her like crap. She told me yesterday she wasn't going to keep the baby but not to tell anyone because she was going to say she miscarried. This is upsetting to me I can't stop thinking about it and I don't know what to say to her. I know it is her decision but should I do or say something? I hate being the only one who knows. Please any advice will be helpful. Thank you ladies

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:52 PM on Nov. 29, 2008 in Pregnancy

Answers (9)
  • sadly there isnt much you can do other than remind her about how wonderful her first baby made her feel..she doesnt need that guy in her life to have a wonderful baby!! its my friends who get my by all the time...

    even though its her choice...you can talk to her and tell her about how friends and family can make her feel better rather than her loser bf who is treating her the way he is..obviously he isnt ready to be a dad if he's acting immature like that..

    he stuck it in her...now he has to deal with it =)
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:54 PM on Nov. 29, 2008

  • i would tell her how u feel about it and tell her there are many ppls out there that can't have children 2 give it up for adoption y kill an innocent live its not there fault
    butterscotch297

    Answer by butterscotch297 at 2:55 PM on Nov. 29, 2008

  • She gets to chose--it is her right. Offer her alternatives and resources, but you can't place your views onto her and her situation. Perhaps she is just worried and scared, show her what resources are out there to help her and then support her regardless of her decision--she's your friend.
    Teachermom01

    Answer by Teachermom01 at 2:56 PM on Nov. 29, 2008

  • there isn't much you can do but be there for her and be supportive. i am very very very much so against abortion and this breaks my heart. But make sure she realizes that the baby is a baby and the babies in the womb feel the stuff the inject into her and they do try and escape it. Look up abortion facts and try and "scare" her out of it... like so she knows its very wrong.. she's probably just scared and doesn't know what to do. Obviously she knows adoption is always a good route... but i don't know how any mother whos had a child could even consider killing the next. ugh soo sad!! Good luck
    krazyash023

    Answer by krazyash023 at 2:59 PM on Nov. 29, 2008

  • Abortion is a hot topic for me...I am very against it. I have had 4 very hard pregnancies, two ending in miscarriage. She doesn't know how lucky she is to have a wonderful blessing inside of her growing! It's a baby and just because the world isn't going right for her doesn't make it right to take that out on a baby that has no choice in the matter. If she doesn't want to baby then maybe she needs to think about other options, like adoption. I know quite a few couples that can't have kids of their own and are paying alot of money just to adopt someone else's child. So I would just try to sit down with her and talk to her about it and just make sure she fully understands what she is doing. Because this is something she will have to live with for the rest of her life and she will never be able to forget aborting her own baby.
    kristinashley24

    Answer by kristinashley24 at 3:45 PM on Nov. 29, 2008

  • all you can do is talk to her tell her your feelings tell her hey since he wont call than get child support otherwise tell her there is better ways and this baby will have your love as well as your families love
    Mommy2Be1212009

    Answer by Mommy2Be1212009 at 4:14 PM on Nov. 29, 2008

  • I would encourage your friend to seek out resources which may help her make an informed decision - planned parenthood, counselor, pregnancy help line, etc. Also, I would ask her why she's feeling as though abortion is the best option - is she doing it because she's mad at the baby's father and hurting because he's abandoned her, or would she truly be unable to care for both children on her own? I honestly feel that every child deserves the best possible life, and adoption doesn't always offer them that chance either - there's no guarantee children will be adopted by loving families, or adopted at all. Trust your friend's instincts about her abilities to care for this child. And give her a hug for me.
    baenglishwc05

    Answer by baenglishwc05 at 6:25 PM on Nov. 29, 2008

  • The best thing you can do is be her friend, regardless of the decision she makes. She is going to have a tough time either way, so a true friend is what she really needs.

    We can't live others lives for them, but we can be their rock when the earth is crumbling in around them. Just remember that she needs support, a shoulder, a strong arm and someone who will never judge her. I wish you both the best.
    happymom612

    Answer by happymom612 at 8:27 PM on Nov. 29, 2008

  • Nothing you can do besides be a friend. its her body, her choice and you cant talk her out of it if thats what she wants shell do it anyway
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:26 PM on Nov. 29, 2008

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