Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

Self mutilation

I need some help from any mom that has had problems or are having problems with their child self cutting os self mutilation??? I really need some one to talk to or give me some support!!!!

Answer Question

Asked by one-is-enough at 2:45 PM on Apr. 4, 2011 in Teens (13-17)

Level 2 (4 Credits)
Answers (19)
  • Can you bring your child to a therapist at all?? Sorry you have to go through this.. good luck!!~

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 2:45 PM on Apr. 4, 2011

  • she needs professional help ,

    Answer by letstalk747 at 2:47 PM on Apr. 4, 2011

  • For my niece, a therapist helped her find other ways to deal with the urge to cut. She was cutting as a way to release stress, anger, and hurt from alot of things that were going on at home and school. She now uses cheerleading, writing, and drawing as a way to cope with the desire to cut.

    Answer by PhoenixsMommy10 at 2:48 PM on Apr. 4, 2011

  • Your child needs to be in therapy, so, do whatever you can to make that happen. If it gets bad enough, the school can report it and have your child put in the mental hospital for a few days, so you should try to address it.

    The cutting is usually a way of lowering anxiety, believe it or not. The person actually feels "numb" and "anxious". the cutting allows a rush of adrenaline, and the cutter feels "alive" and also gets a rush. Ususally there is some sort of history of abuse or long-term trauma that is associating, so that is why therapy is SOOOOOO important.

    What you can do is help your child find a way to manage anxiety. Take you child on daily walk, or do push-ups before bed. Try to get your child to journal . . . and don't read it . . . it is an exercise for them. Teach your child how to meditate or enroll them in yoga.

    Good luck mom!

    Answer by ImaginationMama at 2:51 PM on Apr. 4, 2011

  • here is a site with some info for you about teen cutters...

    I did it a little when i was a teen, but i mostly did it for attention. I pierced my own belly button & burned myself a few times. I eventually realized how stupid it was & just stopped. I honestly cannot tell you why i did it. I don't remember being depressed or anything, i think i was trying to be cool....not knowing that it really wasn't cool to do that. I grew up in the grunge era when everyone was trying to be like Kurt Cobain...all depressed & Gothic...lots of kids were doing it. So glad i grew out of that quick...

    Answer by samurai_chica at 2:51 PM on Apr. 4, 2011

  • Theapy really is the best and only answer if a person is purposfully mutilating their body. Generally it is considered in the OCD/anxiety grouping. If she is at risk for imminent self harm and can be evaluated by a local children's hospital for possible accute residential treatment this is where I personally would start. Cutting may not be the primary dx but tge compulsion of the primary issues. It is something I would make sure a local therapist had much experience in successfully treating. I would also look into EMDR to reduce aniexty and behaviors associated with it.

    Answer by frogdawg at 2:53 PM on Apr. 4, 2011

  • first of you need to realize that you are not the one who needs support. you're not the victim. you need to realize this isn't about you. you need to talk to your child and not make any of it about you. the worst thing you can do is make this about you. your child is hurting. be there for them!! depression is so common and dangerous in teens. you child is the one that needs the support

    Answer by momofone725 at 2:53 PM on Apr. 4, 2011

  • Can't help you as a Mom, but two girls I know also cut themselves during High School and College. Both had suffered traumatic incidents prior to beginning: one was raped and the other's boyfriend was killed in a DUI car accident. Both were using the immediate pain from cutting to take their minds off the mental anguish they were dealing with.

    FYI: Both of the girls are now women, doing fine 4 and 10 years later...

    Answer by GoodyBrook at 2:53 PM on Apr. 4, 2011

  • i also never had an traumatic events happen to me. I was just a weird teen.

    But, you should seek therapy because lots of teens do it because it releases pain that they feel on the inside. Just because i went through a phase, does not mean your DD is just going through a phase. She could really be hurting on the inside, that is why therapy is so important, so that you can figure out her motives & what's going on with her that she feels the need to do this.

    Answer by samurai_chica at 2:54 PM on Apr. 4, 2011

  • I was a pretty severe cutter as a child. I definitely suggest therapy-- look into some kind of behavioral therapy, like diaclectical behavioral therapy. Its more than just "tell me about your childhood" psychotherapy, it gives real practical ways to handle your feelings and change your thought patterns to stop behaviors that are harmful. It can help.
    You can find pretty cheap therapy if you call around, for example, the therapist I currently see charges me $25 per one hour session. Go to and search around.

    Answer by Phrynozoid at 2:55 PM on Apr. 4, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.