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How can I dicipline my 5 and 3 yr old boys?

My 5 and 3 yr old boys are from a previous relationship. Thier father and I were never married and haven't been together for 4 years. In 2009 I was married and we had a daughter. Their father and i went for parenting time and the ref granted that my ex get the boys over nite tue and wed and every other weekend. The boys act out and nothing works not spanking, time outs throwing their toys out nothing im at my wits end and stressed HELP!!!!!!

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mammatimes3

Asked by mammatimes3 at 10:37 PM on Apr. 4, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 2 (8 Credits)
Answers (2)
  • I don't believe in punishing kids. Understanding works way better than trying to control them. Try to see WHY they do what they do, and take it from there. You can't hope to change a child's behaviour through punishment, if the reason why they behaved that way in the first place is still there. KWIM? Punishing them will just make them angry and resentful. (I have 6 kids aged 2, 7, 13, 16, 17 and 20 - understanding works best for all ages and improves your relationship to a point where you don't get "terrible two-yer-olds" or rebellious surly teenage years). It will transform your house into a sanctuary of peace and loving laughter, when you start enjoying and connecting with your kids.
    judimary

    Answer by judimary at 10:42 PM on Apr. 4, 2011

  • Try love and understanding. The boys are going through some pretty major changes in their young lives - it's stressfull, expecially for little ones who don't understand or have any control over what's going on. Spend one on one time with them. Keep them busy so there isn't time to act out or misbehave. Give them praise for what they do right - reinforce positive choices with positive attention. If/when they do something inappropriate take them aside quietly and calmly and ask them "what is going on?" see if you can get to the root of the behavior with a little investigating and a gentle touch. Try to see things from their point of view. A little understanding goes a long way for young children. The best approach for their ages is redirection. Stop the negative activites and replace them with acceptable ones. Don't forget to say "I love you!"
    1Katrina

    Answer by 1Katrina at 10:43 PM on Apr. 4, 2011

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