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How do I change annoying behavior

First, I've been of the mind that people do not change. I believe they can act differently for a while, but they always end up reverting back to the same behavior later. I hope I'm wrong though. I can be a very annoying person. I really don't like this part of myself at all and have tried to change it in the past only to revert back to it again. I don't read people well and I really don't know when I go too far. I can't read the clues in their expressions that would tell me to stop whatever I'm doing. Basically I'm insensitive and kind of socially inept. I want to change because I bother people who I care about. I'm tired of running people out of my life.

 

 

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CallMeAngie

Asked by CallMeAngie at 10:28 AM on Apr. 5, 2011 in Relationships

Level 17 (3,297 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • awww i'm kinda like that too i guess you might need someone to tell you whats annoying. My sister does a good job of talking me down and making me feel stupid in the act but that's her problem.

    have someone tell you what's annoying and next time your put in that situation, practice how your going to react differently. If you have your mind set on doing it properly, you will remind yourself everytime the situation calls for it
    americansugar80

    Answer by americansugar80 at 10:34 AM on Apr. 5, 2011

  • A GREAT book for you is "how to win friends and influence people" Dale Carnegie It will teach you how to read anyone, so you can avoid misunderstanding with others.
    vbruno

    Answer by vbruno at 10:40 AM on Apr. 5, 2011

  • This is the first step, admitting you want to change.

    Next Therapy they can guide you to a better spot if you can't afford it, self help books.... It will be a lot of work but you can do it!!!!!

    It won't happen over night and have faith that you can do it.... Be patient... Good luck!!!!!!
    KFree907

    Answer by KFree907 at 10:49 AM on Apr. 5, 2011

  • As long as you're not being rude or hurtful, your friends and family should accept you the way you are.
    r_elizabeth2290

    Answer by r_elizabeth2290 at 10:58 AM on Apr. 5, 2011

  • I like this quote because it is true: "People only change when the pain of staying the same is greater than the pain of change." I believe that people CAN change, they just have to want to. I'm not a big fan of changing, but I've changed lots of things about myself that I didn't like. In your situation, the best way to change would be to LEARN. Observe people and their facial ques when they are interacting. I know it probably sounds dumb, but there are lots of people that have to learn social skills this way.
    lovingmy4babies

    Answer by lovingmy4babies at 11:06 AM on Apr. 5, 2011

  • It's called a "character defect", we all have them in various forms and degrees- no one is perfect. Self- analization and awareness go a long way. The way to solve something is to get to the core. Why do I do this? Pain, control, frustration, insecurity, attention, etc. Once you find the reason, you then can take steps to target the solution. The mind is a powerful thing and out of it comes our emotions. Pay attention to your thoughts, sometimes it is as easy as learning how to think differently. Good luck. :-)
    LeJane

    Answer by LeJane at 11:50 AM on Apr. 5, 2011

  • Find the core. "Why do I do this?" Attention, fear, lonely, anger, control, power, abandonment, etc. Once you figure that out, you will know where to focus on reconditioning yourself, fixing character defects and controling your dark passengers. We all have them in various forms and strenghts. No one is perfect. Pay attention to your thoughts, What are you allowing yourself to think about? Start by making small changes to become the person you want to be. It will be stepping outside of your comfort zone at 1st, but there lies the answer- do it different . There is a part of you which needs to be controlled and changed, the battle is against yourself. Good luck !!
    LeJane

    Answer by LeJane at 12:02 PM on Apr. 5, 2011

  • I am a bit biased having had an online connection with you...I cannot think of anyone less obnoxious and rude. I do not know how you interact in person but if your online persona is an indication of your personality I am a bit puzzled because I have found you to be kind sweet gentle and heartwarmingly open. I would need a specific example of how you turn people off.
    Gaily.Daily

    Answer by Gaily.Daily at 12:07 PM on Apr. 17, 2011

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