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2 Bumps

Just Wondering

I have been a Christian since I was 14 and I was wondering if anyone else feels the way I do? When you go to church people act so holier than thou that you feel like you don't belong,you don't feel like you are a good enough Christian to fit in. But when you are around people who may or may not be Christians who like to drink and party and you just don't do that as a Christian not that I am judging them it is their choice just like it's my choice not to, but then they treat you like a goody-two-shoe. It's like you just don't belong any where. Does anyone else feel this way? I was just wondering if I am the only one who just doesn't fit in.


Asked by Die4Jesus at 12:47 PM on Apr. 5, 2011 in Religious Debate

Level 13 (1,316 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (16)
  • No you have a relationship with Jesus and not everyone understands or gets that. Often its not the person that may be holier than thou but your perception of it. ASk the Lord to show you what HE sees.. you will be suprised ! He is not mad at them and loves them dearly and you as well. Ask Him to see how He sees their hearts! WHen I did this it was amazing! I had more love and mercy and compassion and grace flowing than ever before.!

    Answer by Shaneagle777 at 8:45 PM on Apr. 7, 2011

  • There is nothing innate in Christianity that states one cannot consume alcohol or have a party. It sounds to me like you need to find a church that fits more in-line with your own beliefs. If you aren't comfortable there, you won't be getting the spiritual refreshment that being a part of a faith community should be providing.

    Answer by Dr.Donna at 1:04 PM on Apr. 5, 2011

  • Been there, Hun, the entire time I was in school! But, of coarse, now I don't care how others may feel about me. I now know that my relationship is with God first and though I love all of humanity God comes first. I know who I am because I know who God is and so I never feel out of place anymore, no matter what church I'm in or bar room for that matter even though I don't drink much. I've been a Christian since I was 4 but I gave my entire life to God when I was 18 and thankfully I'll never feel alone or out of place again.

    Answer by BUTTERCUP777 at 1:12 PM on Apr. 5, 2011

  • I felt like this at one time, but then I had a realization. It wasn't the people at church that were acting "holier than thou," it was my own insecurities that were clouding my perception of them. *I* was the one labeling me as a bad Christian. *I* made myself feel inadequate. Prayer, study, and re-focusing my spiritual life, but those feelings behind me. If you are absolutly certain it is the people and nothing else, than I would suggest looking for a different church. Best of luck to you =)


    Answer by asmcbride at 5:19 PM on Apr. 5, 2011

  • I would try looking for a new church home. I have been in churches where people act like that. I just pray for them. I would also find a new group of friends if they engage in behaviors you dont like. I really do understand where you are coming from.

    Answer by okmommy08 at 1:06 PM on Apr. 5, 2011

  • I choose not to drink for personal reasons, not religious. If people want to bash me for my choice, so be it. The same goes for church, I've always felt very welcome in every parish I've been to, but if I ever feel unwelcome, you'd better believe I'd be moving on. I don't need to associate with people who only want to criticize me due to their own insecurities.

    Answer by anime_mom619 at 1:41 PM on Apr. 5, 2011

  • I can't say that I feel the way that you do. My church family is a warm, loving bunch of people. If you feel like you don't belong at the church you've been attending, then perhaps you don't. Maybe you should visit some others and see what kind of vibe you get. Also, are you extending yourself, or reaching out so to speak to these people? Maybe you are coming across as kind of unapproachable without realizing it. Don't take it personally, I'm just trying to give you some things to think about. Good luck.

    Answer by popzaroo at 2:40 PM on Apr. 5, 2011

  • First off, there's nothing wrong with being a "goody two shoes". Doing what's best for you, your marriage, and your family is a good thing and should come before your friends. But I only go to a bar if my husbands with me and usually it's to watch him shoot pool. Other wise I think I'ld be bored.

    Answer by BUTTERCUP777 at 3:19 PM on Apr. 5, 2011

  • I think you need to make some new friends- irregardless of their religious beliefs. Not all Christians are going to be holier-than-thou and make you feel out of place. Not all non-Christians are going to be hitting the bars after work every day. Why not try to meet people who share common interests outside of religion... join a book club, a mom's night out group, a gym or class. Good luck!

    Answer by Freela at 3:56 PM on Apr. 5, 2011

  • Yes I know people like this, and the whole proud person stuff really gets on my nerves.

    Answer by momto4girzls at 1:06 PM on Apr. 5, 2011