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4 Bumps

I'm the worst mother in the world.....

I was told because of the abuse my son has seen it will scar him.... as soon as I came home he jumps on me. He won't sleep unless he is on me. I feel horrible, I feel like I messed him up for life. He is almost 2 and has witnessed his dad hitting/choking me. I got the protection order today and am going to my grandmothers so his father can't find us. I can't stop crying and I feel so horrible. I'm scared he is going to turn out like his father..... please, I just need someone to talk to.... I know it sounds so stupid but I still love his dad, but he manipulates me in so many ways and I just can't do it anymore.I've been having anxiety attacks all day I'm so sorry to vent it's just my ex isolated me from all my fiends.... and btw I'm not in love with him I just love him if (if that makes sense) we were together 3 years

 
June_Mama09

Asked by June_Mama09 at 3:44 AM on Apr. 6, 2011 in Relationships

Level 26 (26,054 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (17)
  • You are doing the right thing. Nurture your baby the right way from here on out. Do not use spanking or hitting to discipline your child so he can see that not everyone in the world is violent and he can depend on you to be safe. Take care of yourself and do not let anyone abuse you ever again. Do not feel guilty. Learn fron this experience, move on, and know you can do better. hug.
    elizabr

    Answer by elizabr at 8:23 AM on Apr. 6, 2011

  • Get friends, family and a great support system. Make sure he can't locate you and get in church, support group, counseling it will help.

    sweetangie79

    Answer by sweetangie79 at 4:06 AM on Apr. 6, 2011

  • Sweetie your son was reacting to your feelings at that time. My dd got in in my lap when I found my mom paased and I started crying. Kids empathic and be very sensitive, more so then many people realize. Babies know when thier momma's are hurt either physcially or mentally.
    Michigan-Mom74

    Answer by Michigan-Mom74 at 4:44 AM on Apr. 6, 2011

  • You got him out of there before he was old enough to remember any of it. You got the protection order and moved. YOU DID THE RIGHT THING.

    ((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))
    laird6372

    Answer by laird6372 at 3:58 AM on Apr. 6, 2011

  • You're not the worst mom in the world, hun. You did the right thing by getting out and getting away! Your son loves his mama, that's all, and he's responding to the insecurity you feel. Things will get better, and ignore the asshat that told you you're a bad mom and you scarred your son.
    lovingmy4babies

    Answer by lovingmy4babies at 7:33 AM on Apr. 6, 2011

  • You arent the worst mom in the world, you got out. He is only 2 yrs old and yes some of what he saw may stay with him, but it might not just as well. You have alot of time to love him and show him what a good stable life is really like.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 7:33 AM on Apr. 6, 2011

  • You're not a bad mom!! He may remember a small bit but you have every opportunity in the world to urn it around & make life right by him and yourself! Please don't let him( bf) talk you into going back either, You are taking hte right steps protect yourself & your baby, in my eyes that makes you a damn good mother. Jut keep faith hunny, if you need to talk my message box is open! Good luck and give that lil man some hugs & kisses :)
    Mrs_Harsh

    Answer by Mrs_Harsh at 7:43 AM on Apr. 6, 2011

  • Message me if you need to talk, your son will be fine, afterall you showed him that its NOT OK for someone to out their hands on you because YOU LEFT and thats the best thing you can do for him. Now just shower him with love, i dont know how old he is but you teach him how to be a great man!! You stay strong!! Good luck
    JenzAmomOf2

    Answer by JenzAmomOf2 at 8:23 AM on Apr. 6, 2011

  • hugsHang in there! You are a good mom. Peace out...... 

    mamacita69930

    Answer by mamacita69930 at 8:26 AM on Apr. 6, 2011

  • This in no way classifies you as the worst mother in the world, but only a battered one, your son senses this and this is why he does what he is doing, they are very sensitive to mama's feelings and hurts. Just talk to him and let him know that what daddy did is very wrong, and this is why you need to get away, and emphasize that he is never to treat any woman like this....as he grown keep emphasizing this and tell him to always treat women as he would like others to treat you. You and your son will be ok, but it won't be an easy thing to do, do not let this love you feel for his daddy get to you, think of your son when the thought of forgiving comes to you, this for sure will forever scar him.
    older

    Answer by older at 8:30 AM on Apr. 6, 2011

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