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My 5 year old has been hurting other kids lately!! Nothing stops her!

She's usually really sweet! Well mannered, and gentle. I have grounded her, taken away TV, games, time out, staying inside, etc. She doesn' t care. I'm getting worried now because she's lacking control. She bit her brother in the face today. So hard it left a bruise in the shape of teeth. She only says sorry when she wants something or thinks it's gonna get her out of trouble(which it doesn't). Now she kicked her friend in the head for not playing with her. I'm scared she's not going to have friends, and parents won't want her around. I'm stumped! What is her deal? We have told her how to treat others. We didn't show her this!


Asked by Musicmom80 at 8:24 PM on Apr. 7, 2011 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

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This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • Don't focus on punishment. Work on prevention. Have a talk with her then keep a closer eye on her and when you see her attempting to hurt someone then stop her. Keep at it until she thinks you are always watching her. She will stop

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:29 PM on Apr. 7, 2011

  • Is she in school? Go in and ask what has happened lately that could be causing this. Also make sure she gets positive one on one time wih you and your SO. Plus praise when she does things right. Many times a bully is looking for attention they are lacking.

    Answer by elizabr at 8:29 PM on Apr. 7, 2011

  • she sounds like a typical female, who likes to be in control, but is acting in anger when is not getting her way. you need to teach her how she can get more with sugar than she can with vinegar

    Answer by shay1130 at 8:32 PM on Apr. 7, 2011

  • elizbr, she's not a bully. And she get's plenty of one on one attention, and positive re enforcements. That's why I'm stumped. I feel like I've done it all by the books, and it's not working this time! lol

    I agree with anon, I think I'm just gonna have to ride her butt and watch everything she does.

    Comment by Musicmom80 (original poster) at 8:35 PM on Apr. 7, 2011

  • OK so I got a little more info. I feel a little better here. The kicking in the head situation was a little blown up by the other kid. We all sat down. The girl pretended to fall off her bike and pass out(they were playing rescue)....Alysha thought kicking her in the head would make her wake up! OMG She didn't kick her, more like nudged with her foot and her shoe on! Not a great judgement call on her part, but she's inside for the night. I feel a little better. She wants to apologize to the little girl. The little girl(8yo) is perfectly fine.

    Comment by Musicmom80 (original poster) at 8:47 PM on Apr. 7, 2011

  • There is still the issue of biting her Brother, is he older or younger and if older was he picking on her in some way - she needs to be taught other ways of dealing with her anger than lashing out at someone, maybe trying other methods such as deep breathing, counting to ten - there are others that I cannot think of right at the moment.

    Answer by mamamel61 at 1:06 PM on Apr. 9, 2011

  • Did you read where I said we alreadiy do that stuff? My mom is a teacher and almost finished getting her masters in child development. She says there isn't much left to do but ride her butt and watch her really close.

    Comment by Musicmom80 (original poster) at 1:09 PM on Apr. 9, 2011