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4 Bumps

Why do people dislike nice people?

I've always been very friendly to everyone I meet. Always helpful, willing to lend an ear for someone feeling down, but for some reason I'm never included in anything people I know do. They complain about the other people, but spend all their time with them. Why not hang out with someone nice who makes life fun? I dont' get it.


Asked by TwinkleLites at 12:37 AM on Apr. 8, 2011 in Relationships

Level 13 (1,287 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • Misery loves company. They don't want to be around someone who is happy and nice you remind them of how miserable they really are. Be glad they don't want to be around you trying to bring you down to where they are. I have just a couple close friends who are positive and wonderful people.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:41 AM on Apr. 8, 2011

  • I really hope you find a good answer to this because I would like to know myself. Unfortunately, I know exactly where you are coming from.

    Answer by AllAboutKeeley at 12:39 AM on Apr. 8, 2011

  • I would like to know the answer to this one too. It always seems the nice people have less friends than the ones who aren't so nice. What are we doing wrong?

    Answer by amessageofhope at 12:42 AM on Apr. 8, 2011

  • Because no one wears a doormat as a skirt? No really -- The drama friends are their binge food, and you're the toilet they chuck it up in.
    Nice friends don't really have less friends - we just choose our friends more carefully BECAUSE of all the crap that others dump on us about their other friends.... you get to a point of thinking "I don't want people like that in my life, if they can't be true to each other as friends, then why would I want and un-true friend?" I mean, we could be a part of that clique of drama girls, but is it something that we really enjoy or would it be something that we'd just feel like we were enduring for the sake of being honored with an invitation.
    The clique-y clique-y girls want me to come around all the time - but I won't go because I feel like I'm genuine and they aren't. And to me that's a waste of my energy pretending to be like them when I'm not.

    Answer by ShelbyShareAlot at 1:15 AM on Apr. 8, 2011

  • Anon had a good answer. I also think people who are upbeat are had for those in pain to handle emotionally. I think it makes them uncomfortable, so to feel better, they put others down or are critical. Just a thought.

    Answer by tasches at 1:34 AM on Apr. 8, 2011

  • DRAMA! I know exactly how you feel. It's all drama. Those people need drama. They come to you to "complain" about their drama when in reality, they really just wanted to talk about it. I can't stand that. You aren't going to cause any drama, what will they have to complain about you ?? If they do have something to complain about after hanging out with you, who will they complain to ? Do they have anyone else thats trustworthy that can vent to that won't tell others? Probably not. That's why they use you to vent, but don't hang out with you. I'm sorry, Girl! Maybe try to not be there as much for those ppl and maybe they will see whats going on ??

    Answer by loudnproud87 at 1:47 AM on Apr. 8, 2011

  • Thanks everyone for the awesome advice. I think I do choose good people for my real friends and the other ones just are users who need to be heard.

    Comment by TwinkleLites (original poster) at 2:01 AM on Apr. 8, 2011

  • Maybe you aren't coming off as nice. Maybe your "niceness" is presenting itself as phony. I don't know, ask someone you trust how you're perceived by others.

    Answer by Syphon at 10:52 AM on Apr. 8, 2011