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Who was in the right? And was she out of line? adult content

I have been trying to up my daughters sleep time from whenever she wants (10:30-1:00 am) to a set 10:00. Shes 28 months. She has been screaming and crying since 10 and its now 12:40. My mom came in (we split a house, theres two suites and we pay half of everything and have separate food and fridges) to our living room and said " if she keeps crying do you mind if i go in there and cuddle her?" i say no, she HAS to learn that bedtime is bedtime and theres no getting out of it since this is the 3rd night this has happened (we go in to check on her and she usually stops after about 5 min) but the last two nights its been 1+ hour of screaming pissy fits. And my mom says this.

If you dont go in there and get her, I will regardless of what you say.

I snapped. I said NO. YOUR NOT. YES, I AM and we get into a screaming match and at one point i believe i said i dont care if your the fucking queen of sheba, shes still my kid, not yours, so what my DH and i say goes.

Who was right?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:44 AM on Apr. 8, 2011 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (15)
  • You are right, totally right. Your mother was completely out of line. My grandma has done that crap to me before and it ended up exactly likes yours. She doesn't think she did anything wrong. There was one time when he was newborn and I couldn't get him to quit crying it was like 2am, at the time she was living with my parents too and she rushed in and literally grabbed him out of my arms. I was so angry. Mothers and grandmothers always step over the line. They most of the time think they know it all because they've done this before. I was told once that I was raised very good, so there's no reason why I shouldn't trust her judgment with my son since I had such a great childhood !! OMG! That made me soooo angry. I know how you feel, Girl! You gotta make the bounderies super clear to her and whenever she crosses over one, you better push her back real quick before it gets work. Good luck!!
    loudnproud87

    Answer by loudnproud87 at 6:39 AM on Apr. 8, 2011

  • Try to calm down chica, relax. Drink some tea or just sit back and take long breaths. Hopefully she'll realize she crossed the line and apologize in the morning. I know it's hard, hang in there. My mom is overbearing at times too. Oh and just a little suggestion: apologizing (NOT for standing your ground, but for getting worked up and yelling) helps a lot :)
    Raccoon

    Answer by Raccoon at 1:53 AM on Apr. 8, 2011

  • Your child=your rules. She doesn't have any right to say that she's going to go against your rules for your daughter.
    kasey22

    Answer by kasey22 at 2:15 AM on Apr. 8, 2011

  • I think you were right. I can understand get being frustrated at the crying, but that's what babies and small children do. your mom needs to respect your parenting decisions. Like you said, she's your child not hers. Good luck!
    Raccoon

    Answer by Raccoon at 1:49 AM on Apr. 8, 2011

  • I had to let my daughter CIO for sleep training and it was horrible. I hope to never have to repeat the experience because it was awful for both of us. I don't think it's the best thing to do, and I think there are lots of other, more gentle ways to get her to sleep on time. BUT, that is YOUR child and your mother has no right to say that she will do what she wants regardless of what you say. NOT OKAY.
    Ati_13

    Answer by Ati_13 at 1:55 AM on Apr. 8, 2011

  • Im so angry im shaking! Even my moms husband thinks she crossed the line, and hes usually on HER side!!!
    BTW Dh took her out driving around so shell fall asleep in the carseat since he has work tomorrow and we need sleep sometime
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 1:49 AM on Apr. 8, 2011

  • You were right, it's your child period. I do agree that you should apologize for yelling to her and explain to her calmly that you and your husband raise your child as you see fit.
    GomezMami2908

    Answer by GomezMami2908 at 2:17 AM on Apr. 8, 2011

  • I would apologize if she had dropped it at the first 3 no, you are not going in theres. But she wouldnt stop. Im going to let her read this so maybe she sees my point
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:19 AM on Apr. 8, 2011

  • Just for clarification we didnt kust let her CIO. We tried laying down with her, hugging her, cuddling, walking around, did 2 diaper changes in that 3 hours and nothing worked untill DH took her in the car riding around. Then she passed out. And she saw all of this as well.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:32 AM on Apr. 8, 2011

  • You're right. She is your child, not hers. She has to learn to respect your parenting rules, whether she likes it or not.
    tiffanynichols

    Answer by tiffanynichols at 2:35 AM on Apr. 8, 2011

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