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When the foundation cracks?

Hypothetical question. What would you do if your SO talked to other girls online for the first 2 years of your relationship, but after you had a baby, seemed to stop. And his reason is "we weren't that serious" even though that whole time he told you how much he loved you and spent nights at your house. Would you be able to get over it?

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Asked by Anonymous at 5:37 PM on Nov. 30, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • (cont) He also talked to a girl he liked in highschool through emails and phone even AFTER I moved in. I just can't seem to get over the hurt. I thought I had made up my mind to leave, talked to anothe rman online (i know i know) b ut he found out and said that what i did was worse than him because we have a child now. Seriously?

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:40 PM on Nov. 30, 2008

  • It could be he didn't think what he did was serious because you knew he was talking to other girls and yet you still slept with him. To a man, that is approval. You admit you were talking to guys after he quit, after he took you seriously after having a baby, that is different. I mean, how many guys sleep over a girls house one night and then find another one for Saturday? If you have guy friends you know exactly what that means. But he quit for you and then you decided to take your hurt and try to hurt him? A little late.
    You can get over it if you want to. Just give up your ideas of doing what he did, it isn't the same.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:44 PM on Nov. 30, 2008

  • Did you marry my husband???? I would like to know ;)

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:55 PM on Nov. 30, 2008

  • That's really tough to get over, I'm sorry to hear that... I think you need to decide if it's worth it to you first and then if it is, work through it together. You're never going to forget, but you may be able to forgive. People can change...

    Answer by lillie023 at 7:38 PM on Nov. 30, 2008

  • well me and my SO lived in different states for the first 3 years of our realationship sooooo things were a little interesting I was really mean to him and would just stop talking to him for months and alot of other really bad things to him, I refused to see im only like once or twice a year so yea he started talking to girls online and even saw some of them and ya know...... and he even said that he wanted to break up with me cause he knew cheating was wrong but he couldnt do it... and it hurt me so bad when he told me but I kinda had to understand knowing what id put him through!! so that was my choice to accept it and forgive him for it and it honastly hardley crosses my mind know!! but you have to choose to forgive him and realize he is with you and not them!!

    Answer by scaredmommy08 at 8:05 PM on Nov. 30, 2008

  • i think it's the same. he did something that hurt you and you did something that hurt him. it doesn't matter when either of them were done because it's already done. you can either move on or dwell on it.

    Answer by chyna_doll at 9:52 PM on Nov. 30, 2008

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