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4 Bumps

Looking at porn and naked women on internet adult content

Ok so not that I am a hueg stickler about this normally but I have been finding that my SO has been looking at Red-tube(porn site) and pics of naked women quite a bit over the last few weeks. I normally would not think about this at all cause I do think most men do this, but for some reason he's been doing it every night (I work late a lot) and now I am bothered by it. He's not neglecting me in any way sexually, we still have a great sex life but I am not sure why I am all of the sudden upset by this. I can see from the history in our computer what he's been looking at and it's not anything out of the usual. I think the main thing is that he does not tell me about it or will not just come out and say he is when confronted. Why does he feel the need to hide it? Should I ask more? Should I leave it alone since he's not neglecting me? I really don't know how to feel right now. Also the insecure woman in me wonders with the "type" of women he looks at and I do not look like them what so ever, and yet he still tells me he loves how I look, why do I feel not good enough or that he's like me more if I did look like that? I guess I am just being over emotional but its weighing on my mind and I don't like how I feel knowing that he's watching and looking at these things all night while I am gone. Anyone else deal with this? Help please.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:18 PM on Apr. 8, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (14)
  • I wouldn't worry about it too much. DH looks at porn sometimes just cuse he's bored, when I'm not around.
    Liamsmom09

    Answer by Liamsmom09 at 12:21 PM on Apr. 8, 2011

  • maybe it is just a new hobby? I never caught onto the answers thing and suddenly one day I started looking more and more and now i'm on daily during naptime and when the kids are asleep for the night. Maybe he just found something to occupy his time.. guys think way differently than we do.. who knows lol He knows it bugs you so he wont admit to it or not even he knows why he does it. laugh it off and see if you can find a new "Hobby" for him
    zoejains_momma

    Answer by zoejains_momma at 12:23 PM on Apr. 8, 2011

  • I wouldn't worry. He is not neglecting you in any way, so just let it go. He may not 'fess up when you ask him about because he doesn't want to hurt your feelings or make you insecure.
    KateShesGreat3

    Answer by KateShesGreat3 at 12:24 PM on Apr. 8, 2011

  • It might not have anything to do with him wanting a different type of woman. I wouldn't jump to conclusions that make you insecure. In fact it might be that HE has a desire that HE is insecure about. Maybe he has a particular fantasy that has developed in his mind and he's too embarrassed to share it. Fantasies can be powerful and scary. When I was younger there were a lot of things that I found to be turn ons that I thought made me a straight freak and I was too scared to tell anyone I dated. It wasn't until I started getting into the online realm that I realized I wasn't that strange and that most of the things I enjoy are actually pretty common :)

    I can't know whats going on with your DH I just don't want you to feel bad about yourself if you don't need to. If it was something with you or his desire for you then I would think you would notice him being less attentive to you sexually. GL
    kayslay

    Answer by kayslay at 12:24 PM on Apr. 8, 2011

  • I wouldn't worry to much. It's most likely due to you working late and he's bored. My DH actually goes to the same site. It's constantly popping up on the web address bar. I'd rather him look at porn than out cheating on me :) He probably does come forward b/c they do get embarrassed. My DH giggles uncontrollable and gets a little red faced when I joke about it with him.
    amberdawnbarr

    Answer by amberdawnbarr at 12:26 PM on Apr. 8, 2011

  • It'd bother the crap out of me. Id let him know if your bothered by it... That's the most you can do. Don't forbid him to do it, but hopefully knowing your bothered by the amount he is looking at will make him cut back....
    BabyBugsmama

    Answer by BabyBugsmama at 12:32 PM on Apr. 8, 2011

  • I agree with Liamsmom09, guys do all kinds of stuff when we aren't around and often it's because without us they don't know what to do with themselves.
    ItsMe89

    Answer by ItsMe89 at 1:03 PM on Apr. 8, 2011

  • I'm usually the one in your SO's shoes. I go through periods when I watch ALOT of porn and do ALOT of masterbating while never neglecting my husband. Please give him a break remember that men are stimulated visually but are usually happy with what they have at home.
    KoolMom617

    Answer by KoolMom617 at 1:17 PM on Apr. 8, 2011

  • Wouldn't stress too much. He is not neglecting you. Just looking at porn.
    pookiekins34

    Answer by pookiekins34 at 1:18 PM on Apr. 8, 2011

  • i think it bothers you because he doesn't tell you. since it's bothering you know then you should talk to him about it.
    xavierlogan09

    Answer by xavierlogan09 at 1:55 PM on Apr. 8, 2011

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