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Are wedding vows that don't include God fraud? adult content

This was my discussion yesterday at Bible study.. If your wedding vows do not include God is it fraud or just faithless?

The argument yesterday was that a marriage is a union between two people put before God. So, if there is no God in your vows is there a marriage or just two people playing house..

I'm posting this anonymously because I do know it is a can of worms and it got very heated yesterday and I don't really care to be attacked on my personal page.. just asking what other Moms on here think.


Asked by Anonymous at 8:24 AM on Apr. 10, 2011 in Religion & Beliefs

This question is closed.
Answers (18)
  • I'm LDS (latter day saint/mormon-NOT FLDS lol), and when we get married our union isn't just before God, it's INCLUDING God. There are THREE people involved in your marriage. Husband, Wife and Heavenly Father. We SHOULD be taking our problems with each other, our dissagreements, our hurt, our dissapointments and our DECISIONS to Him to help us through, to understand one another and to gain a better perspective and understanding of one another. Just to be a better spouse in the partnership of marriage.
    Not only that, but how we should be teaching our children, how to be better parents and to get through those tough and trying times being a parent.

    So to answer your question....I believe marriage is good. I believe it is meant to help us learn and grow. I believe it's of I believe it's something you should be including God in.
    There are individuals that don't believe in God or believe, but don't put Him as a priority.

    Answer by CABlonde at 11:29 AM on Apr. 10, 2011

  • So atheist can't be married? What about Hindus? Or Taoist? You can only be Christian to be married? I think that is sad that someone would think this.

    A marriage that does not mention God in the vows is a marriage that does not mention God.  I think it would be more of a fraud to have God mentioned if that is not what the couple believes. 

    Marriage is a legal standing, not a ceremonial one.  It is more than jumping over a broom stick or the binding of hands together.  Just because someone does not have/want God mentioned in the vows does not make it any less of a marriage.  I know atheist that are more committed to each other than high standing church couples.  Having God mentioned does not make the marriage, it's people that make the marriage.


    Answer by layh41407 at 8:36 AM on Apr. 10, 2011

  • I don't believe it is fraud, but then again my belief is marriage is a legal contract between two adults.

    Answer by LoveBuggsMommie at 8:26 AM on Apr. 10, 2011

  • Marriage has been around FAR longer than Christianity. If that were true, none of us that believe in anything but God could be married.

    Marriage is a legal contract between two people that creates kinship. To be recognized by generally any US court system, you have to fill out paperwork, swear in, and provide your signature. That's all that "marriage" is to me. The act of marriage usually creates normative or legal obligations between the individuals involved. In some societies these obligations also extend to certain family members of the married persons.

    In my point of view God has nothing to do with it, unless you're religious.

    (Of course I love my husband, but I am pointing out that we didn't have to be married to make the commitment. That was just the contract itself. We did have to be married (aka have the contract) so the state and government would recognize us as a married household for our taxes and medical!) =)

    Answer by Razelda at 8:41 AM on Apr. 10, 2011

  • I think it depends on your beliefs. Technically, a marriage is in the eyes of the law, so whether God is involved or not is unimportant, however, many people are very religious, and being so means that marriage is in the eyes of their God and the law, which would mean that a marriage without an oath to God is meaningless. GL. I hope people can keep their heads.

    Answer by BisketLiss at 8:27 AM on Apr. 10, 2011

  • Marriage (at least in our country) is done by the State, so I don't think it'd be fraud. Also, with a freedom of religion, it's not necessarily going to be a certain God that the marriage will be before, ya know?

    Personally, we included God in our vows :)

    Answer by laird6372 at 8:33 AM on Apr. 10, 2011

  • The argument yesterday was that a marriage is a union between two people put before God. So, if there is no God in your vows is there a marriage or just two people playing house..

    That is the thought process of a complete idiot. Marriage existed for thousands of years before there was ever a bible or an Abrahamic religion to sanctify it.

    Answer by NotPanicking at 10:37 AM on Apr. 10, 2011

  • no. my marriage vows did include god..however, i wish they did not. to me, it felt like a lie..(or a show) for my family. it wasnt what i believed or really wanted. Honestly, i had no idea though that this was what the minister was going to do. i thought i was just getting someone to wed us in our package. i bought a package so i thought it would just be some ordained minister but when he got there it was this very old man who exclaimed to us how important his beliefs were and so we respected that. we just smiled at each other every time "god" was mentioned

    Answer by shay1130 at 8:32 AM on Apr. 10, 2011

  • No. Whether or not a couple includes God in their idea of marriage doesn't change or invalidate the commitment they're making to each other, the love the feel for one another. Marriage is NOT merely a religious act, it's been a part of society throughout all times and within all cultures/versions of faith or nonfaith. Christianity, or religion in general, does not hold a monopoly on the validity or legitimacy of marriage.And I don't believe God cares whether a couple recognize or include Him, so long as they treat one another with the love and respect that should be part of each and every relationship.

    I would be more willing to consider the idea of marriages, whether religious/Christian or not, where there isn't love and respect, where one spouse is abused, for example, as "fraudulent" than I would be willing to consider non-religious marriages somehow invalid....

    Answer by bandgeek521 at 8:35 AM on Apr. 10, 2011

  • No, I don't think so. Many people get married in courthouses and in private ceremonies that are secular or pull elements of both spouse's beliefs. I suppose someone's church could try to say it is, but it's a legal agreement filed with your state if done properly. I suppose if someone's church didn't recognize their inter-faith (or whatever) marriage, then they would need to make a decision whether they should wait and marry someone else or whether they need to find a NEW church where both spouses are welcome and recognized. Either way, it has no effect on the validity or legality of the marriage. It's up to each individual to decide whether it's valid or invalid within their faith or if they need to rethink their religion if they want to marry someone 'unacceptable' to their church or if their church did not like the type of ceremony or vows they took.

    Answer by pam19 at 9:09 AM on Apr. 10, 2011