My daughter just in the last few months has had many guys dump her or her friends will say something that will make the guy dump her,I've tried to tell my daughter that boys in junior high are not ready or mature enough to be boyfriend material. Theirs lots of guys in junior high that are cute but she shouldn't be going through all the boys. I've seen tons of guys ask her out and it seems like she goes for it. Is their something I'm missing how do I counsel with her to tell her she needs to stop? She can't keep going through all these boys she needs to wait till she is emotionally ready. She is only 13 I'm scared she will do something she will regret like have sex with a boy. I know your gonna say that she is a teenager and she is gonna do whatever behind our backs. Well I need to trust my daughter to make the right choice. She says she doesnt like to be alone with boys,and she says whenever I have the sex talk,she says she isnt like that.
Asked by Anonymous at 12:00 PM on Apr. 10, 2011 in Teens (13-17)
Answer by TweenAndTwinMom at 12:45 PM on Apr. 10, 2011
Answer by admckenzie at 12:07 PM on Apr. 10, 2011
Answer by Cochise at 12:04 PM on Apr. 10, 2011
Answer by samurai_chica at 12:09 PM on Apr. 10, 2011
Answer by samurai_chica at 12:13 PM on Apr. 10, 2011
I would seriously try to dial back her social life. A 13 year old does not need a boyfriend, and all the drama you are describing tells me she isn't ready for the responsibility that comes with dating. Encourage her to do things with her girl friends and increase family activities. There will be plenty of time for boys later. I'm not saying you shouldn't still explain sexual safety, but don't get roped into believing "you might as well go along with it because it's going to happen anyway" because it doesn't have to be like that. Assuming the worst often leads to the worst, so stay positive. GL!
Answer by TweenAndTwinMom at 12:20 PM on Apr. 10, 2011
Thinking further, I think you should be very worried, and you should do whatever you can to stop this behavior. My daughter is almost 15 and not yet allowed to have a boyfriend (I agree very much with samurai chica on this point). My daughter has a friend who sounds very much like your daughter with all the drama and boyfriends. My daughter's friend is 14 and pregnant. My daughter's friend also was missing for over 24 hours this past weekend, and I can only imagine how terrible that was for her parents.
I also agree with admckenzie that your daughter's behavior could very well be driven by low self-esteem. This may not be as simple as saying, "you can't have a boyfriend". You should consider looking for a professional to talk to about this and get on top of the situation before it gets worse. It's the sort of thing could really lead her in the wrong direction and have a major impact on the rest of her life.
Answer by TweenAndTwinMom at 12:42 PM on Apr. 10, 2011
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