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At what age would you allow your child to attend a funeral?

it looks like my husbands grandma (so our kids great grandma) will not make it to the end of the year.... possibly even Summer. The in laws and my husband have informed me it'll be my decision entirely on whether the kiddos attend or not

Son is 6 (6 1/2 on April 30th) and daughter is 4 3/4 (five on May 30th) and they're average maturity for their age(s).... I've only ever been to two funerals and I was 16+ at both. Is there an "industry standard"? And what would small children be expected to wear?

Answer Question
 
hibbingmom

Asked by hibbingmom at 5:52 PM on Apr. 10, 2011 in Religion & Beliefs

Level 35 (71,876 Credits)
Answers (20)
  • My grandmother passed 1 1/2 years ago. DS was 7 at the time and DD 4. I brought both of them to the funeral. During the wake, we kept them out of the room, and DH and I took turns with caring for them. They sat through the service in the chapel, and that was it as we didn't have a burial.
    I felt it was important to have them with me.
    sahmamax2

    Answer by sahmamax2 at 5:54 PM on Apr. 10, 2011

  • There is no industry standard. I have seen kids of all ages at funerals. It is your call. They can wear anything,preferably dark colors. Not any thing bright like Easter.
    dancer

    Answer by dancer at 5:55 PM on Apr. 10, 2011

  • As soon enough as they can understand. Death is a part of life and children in my opinion must experience and learn it. It's all part of growing up and living life. ; ) xoxo
    luckygurl1313

    Answer by luckygurl1313 at 5:56 PM on Apr. 10, 2011

  • Probably12-13
    MexTexmom2

    Answer by MexTexmom2 at 5:56 PM on Apr. 10, 2011

  • Sorry to hear about your dh's grandmother. My kids have been attending funerals since birth pretty much. Both attended funerals at just a few weeks because it was close family who died. Death is a part of life no need to hide it from them. It's one of those topics you don't want to explain, but at some point need to. Good luck and again sorry for your situation.
    luvmygrlz

    Answer by luvmygrlz at 5:59 PM on Apr. 10, 2011

  • DD was almost 4 last year my my X stepfather died. I took her to the funeral and she did fine. I however, couldn't not take her because we had to travel to ND and DH is military, and could not keep her with him.
    admiring_u_14

    Answer by admiring_u_14 at 6:00 PM on Apr. 10, 2011

  • A funeral is not a privilege. When someone passes, you go rather you find a sitter or not. It's a very inconvenient thing, someone passing. Take ur kids in dress clothes.
    shynu

    Answer by shynu at 6:24 PM on Apr. 10, 2011

  • A funeral is a natural thing I took my oldest for the firlst time at 6 month old and she went again at 3 yrs old my other 2 children have not been to one yet but if something happened I would take them. I see nothing wrong with it, we just explained to her that granny is in heaven and that is just her body but her soul is in heaven with Jesus now. We go to church and talk about jesus daily in our house so my dd was excited for her granny to be with Jesus now.
    L0vingMy3Girls

    Answer by L0vingMy3Girls at 6:44 PM on Apr. 10, 2011

  • I think that it would serve as the "good a time as any" type deal. The other one's are right, it is a part of life and def something that they should be able to embrace. As far as clothing goes...just some nice "Sunday" clothes...nothing that they might pay more attention to than whats at hand. Im so sorry about ya'lls situation. God be with you all.
    cinnamon212000

    Answer by cinnamon212000 at 6:48 PM on Apr. 10, 2011

  • Our children go from the time they are born.
    SabrinaMBowen

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 7:13 PM on Apr. 10, 2011

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